Teach Me To Feel
by perichan
Summary: Draco's being abused, badly, and Harry finds him and wants to help, but can he persuade Draco that he's sincere, and will their friendship blossom into something more? WARNING: Sexual abuse throughout, some child abuse flashbacks. Slash
1. Tainted

**A/N:** This looks like it's going to be a long story, but the good news is I have the plot all written out which is something I have a problem with doing, so usually my long stories end up trailing away and being forgotten because I have no idea how to end them, this one however has a beginning, middle and end so that will spur me on to finish it.

**Warning:** Contains physical and sexual abuse, raunchy sex scenes, angst, despair and heart shattering sadness, please enjoy! Reviews much appreciated.

_**Chapter 1 - Tainted**_

Draco's father had always been more interested in hurting Draco than helping him. The years of physical and mental abuse Draco had received until his acceptance into Hogwart's at the age of 11 played as a stark reminder as to why Draco never trusted people. Draco had long suspected that when his father had introduced Crabbe and Goyle as 'friends and bodyguards' when they were 10 he'd had other motives. And as the thick, heavy fist of Crabbe's right hand collided with Draco's stomach he was once again reminded that his instincts were almost always right.

"Alright, I don't want you to crack any of his ribs," Blaise Zabini's voice sneered over the dull thuds of Crabbe's continued assault on Draco's body. "Not 'til I'm done with him anyway." Although Draco couldn't see Blaise from the wall his face was currently being pressed against, he could practically hear the smirk on his face. Goyle tightened his grip on Draco's bound wrists and pulled him from the wall, roughly slamming him face first onto the desk next to him causing the blond to bite his lip as his chin connected with the wood, his mouth filling with blood. He swallowed hard, desperate not to give Blaise the satisfaction of his defeated cries.

Blaise's hands lifted up Draco's robes unceremoniously and he roughly ran his fingers against the pale, cold flesh on Draco's back. Draco willed himself not to shiver apprehensively at what he knew was coming next. Predictably, and almost seductively, Blaise's hands began to pull Draco's trousers to his ankles before he traced his cold fingers up Draco's inner thighs, pushing his legs apart with his own, stronger legs. Draco could hear Blaise fumbling with the clasp on his own trousers before he heard the sound of fabric falling to the floor. Blaise's hands grasped each side of Draco's hips and he had mere seconds to brace himself before Blaise forced himself inside the now trembling Malfoy, a choked cry escaping his lips causing the smile on Blaise's face to widen further.

"That's right Draco, fight me, groan, scream against me," He thrust harder, deeper, his finger nails digging into Draco's hips and drawing blood. "It's more fun that way."

After all the abuse Draco had suffered, whether at home or at school, physical, mental or sexual, he still couldn't stifle the anguished cries escaping his lips, the tears that fell from his eyes and onto the hard desk. His hands pulled pointlessly at the ropes that cut into his wrists, his body writhing against the bodies pressing down on his, penetrating him. And then with his most violent, forceful thrust Blaise finished inside the trembling Slytherin, the loud cry that escaped Draco's mouth causing the satisfied grin on his face to broaden still further as he pulled his trousers back up to his waist and did them up.

"Pull his clothes back on him." Blaise commanded of Crabbe and Goyle as he began to straighten his clothes and hair. "And make sure that when you're finished with him he doesn't need to go to the hospital wing, _again_." He added contemptuously, that smile still playing at his lips as Draco's clothes were roughly pulled back over his skin, his body left to fall to the floor with a thud before Crabbe and Goyle proceeded to kick and punch at every piece of flesh they could reach.

Draco's eyes screwed up against the agony, his body twitching with spasms of pain as Crabbe and Goyle eventually unknotted the ropes that bound him before lumbering from the room leaving Draco breathing erratically on the floor clutching at his body with his newly freed arms, willing himself to just die on the spot so he didn't have to suffer any longer.

~*~*~*~

Draco heaved his tired, aching body through a bathroom door after spending several hours on the deserted classroom floor. He knew no one would stumble across him until the morning as it was the beginning of the Christmas holidays and there were few people still at school, even fewer in need of a classroom or bathroom at such a late time of night, or morning, he wasn't sure of the time exactly. He limped his way over to the sinks removing his robes to reveal his torso and took in his desperate reflection, his face expressionless as he scanned every inch of skin he could see. His left eye was bruised already and squinted closed against the pain, his lip was swollen and crusted with blood, and small cuts littered his temples and hair line, his blond hair streaked with crimson. Barely an inch of his chest or sides wasn't covered in bruises; purple, yellow, red, blue, every colour skin wasn't supposed to be. Some bruises were shaped like knuckles and fists, some the perfect imprint of trainer soles and some were just large blobs of painful colour against his stark pale skin. As Draco slowly lowered his trousers a little he saw the claw marks of Blaise's fingernails still red and bleeding across his hips, his buttocks, his groin.

Draco closed his eyes against the sight of himself disgusted by what he saw. He put his hands on the sink in front of him to help balance himself, not putting as much weight on his left hand which shot daggers through his wrist which he suspected was fractured. Taking a deep, steadying breath he reopened his eyes and began to pull sheets of paper towelling from the holder in the wall, wetting them slightly under the tap, and beginning the long, painful process of tidying up his appearance as much as possible before stumbling his way back to the dungeons and into his bed where he would try fruitlessly to sleep with nothing but his pain and silent sobs for company as the long hours burned away.

Thoroughly lost in his thoughts Draco didn't hear the door to the bathroom open with a creek, the soft sound of shoes on tiles, and the abrupt silence that followed as the black haired figure that rounded the corner stopped at the sight of the blond before them. Draco continued to dab at the blood on his forehead for a whole minute before Harry finally found enough breath and muscle control to speak at least one world.

"Malfoy?" His name came to him as a whisper and it took him a short while to register that he'd heard it at all. Tearing his eyes from his own reflection Draco looked at Harry's frozen figure in the mirror before him, his eyes scanning every inch of Draco's savaged body, but Draco didn't care. He found he often had no emotions in the few hours that followed one of his episodes. _That's what father always called them, my little episodes._

"Potter." Malfoy's voice was cold, distant, but distinctly louder than Harry's had been. His eyes focused back on his own figure as Draco continued to wipe the now dry blood from his face, acting as though Harry wasn't even there.

"What..." Harry stammered, afraid of the answer but even more afraid of Draco's sober, emotionless reaction to him. "What happened to you?" He managed, again his voice barely a whisper. His feet were still rooted to the spot, his body rigid. It was a good thing really, if he had the strength to move he wasn't sure whether he'd run from the room terrified or fall to the floor and cry. Draco continued to mop at his face morosely for a little while longer, not even acknowledging Harry until he'd discarded the blood soaked mass of paper and pulled himself some more from his right, his body swaying dangerously as his good hand left the sink to retrieve it.

"Nothing exciting." He finally drawled as he began to gingerly clean the black eye that was laced with crusted blood. He winced despite himself as he put too much pressure on the new bruise and his eyes closed against the pain. He dropped both his hands to the sink, his body rocking dangerously as he felt a wave of dizzying tiredness washing over him. He seemed to see what was happening in slow motion. He felt his knees buckle, his legs collapsing beneath him. His hands couldn't grip the sink tight enough to hold up his suddenly heavy body and he began to fall to the floor. He braced himself for a collision with hard, ceramic tiles that seemed to never come, and then he realised that he'd landed, but onto something soft, something warm, something that was vibrating. No, it wasn't vibrating, it was trembling. A hand tentatively brushed his forehead, but it wasn't his hand.

Sighing to fill his empty lungs with oxygen, an action that in itself hurt, he managed to slowly prise his heavy eyelids apart and gaze into those emerald green eyes he'd come to know so well over the years. But they weren't hurtful or teasing or like anything he'd ever seen them before. They were hurt, anxious, terrified. They darted across Draco's face in a frenzied panic and as Draco's own eyes began to take in more of the bespectacled boys face he realised his lips were moving frantically, quivering whenever they stopped, slightly parted.

"Malfoy?" The word was a whisper at the back of his mind as his senses began to return to him. "Malfoy?!" The word was now a scream in his ear and he closed his eyes against the volume of it. "Draco, answer me!" That hand was brushing gently across his face again, shaking as it touched his skin. _Afraid of me no doubt, disgusted._ "Draco, please!"

"Alright," Draco sighed annoyed as his senses were brought back to their fullest and the pain returned to sear at his nerves. "Stop your whining, I'm right here."

"What happened to you?" The question was quick and thick with worry. "Are you alright? I mean I know you're not alright, I can see that but... but... are you alright?" Draco smirked slightly despite himself and faintly shook his head.

"Do you always ramble so much Potter?" He was aware that he was resting in Harry's lap, one of the boy's arms was wrapped round his shoulders to support him and his legs were sprawled underneath Draco in such a way that couldn't have been comfortable, but he wasn't complaining. Draco would probably have pulled himself from this undignified place if he had the strength, but he didn't, and he wasn't even sure that he'd have moved if he had.

"I need to get you to the hospital wing." Harry began but made no attempt to move Draco's body in fear of causing him more undue pain. Draco's eyebrows furrowed however and he made a fleeting attempt to lift himself up.

"I don't think so Potter." He tried to lift himself into a sitting position but his wrist cracked dangerously as he put pressure on it, his lower body screaming in agony after Blaise's violation. Draco gasped in pain and fell roughly back into the Gryffindor's lap. Harry pulled his now panting body closer to his own, his hand running over the blonde's body an inch above his flesh, afraid to press on the bruises.

"You need medical attention." Harry whimpered against Draco's protests to seek help. Draco just scoffed, his eyes still closed as he relaxed against Harry's warm body, unable to muster the strength for another attempt at getting up.

"I've had worse." Draco said derisively, immediately wishing he'd not revealed such a secret to one of his worst rivals. "What do you care anyway Potter?" He scorned trying to cover up his last comment. He didn't receive an immediate answer, _you don't care,_ but the feel of warm droplets splashing against his face caused him to open his eyes and look up. Tears spilled down Harry's face causing Draco to screw his face up in confusion.

"What do you mean you've had worse?" The words were heavy with concern and hurt, tears still falling thickly onto Draco's face. "And how could I not care? Look at you." His voice broke as he spoke, his eyes once again flickering across Draco's battered body. _You don't care,_ Draco mused still confused by Harry's reaction, _no one cares. I'm repulsive, and your concerns a lie._ Draco's face fell stern once more; Harry had to be mocking him, there was no other explanation for it.

Bracing himself against the pain to come and mustering as much energy as he could Draco endeavoured to once again pull himself out of Harry's grasp. He put less pressure on his injured hand this time, rolling onto his side and straining to pull himself onto his hands and knees. Harry's hands went to Draco's sides to steady him.

"Let me help you." Draco swatted Harry's hands away from him; his features growing angrier the more Harry mocked him.

"I neither want nor need your help Potter." He spat as he finally managed to pull himself into a kneeling position and sighed deeply at the effort. But not wanting to show any more weakness he grasped at the sinks beside him and began to pull his shaking body to a stand. His legs protested at the weight of his body but he willed them to support him as he finally rose, leaning heavily against the sink for extra support. His heart was beating fast and his breathing was erratic and quick as dots swam in front of his eyes, but he forced himself to stay upright and conscious although he still swayed dangerously on the spot.

"You need help, look at you." Harry's voice was barely a whisper but vibrated around the room in a quiet echo.

"Yes, I'm disgusting; I don't need you to remind me." Draco's words erupted angrily from him before he could stop them, he was furious that Harry was still here, taunting him further, and once the torrent began he couldn't stop it. "Just looking at my reflection makes me feel sick, I don't need you and everyone else reminding me how nauseating I am. Don't you think I've been beaten enough tonight without your sarcastic remarks? I get it, I got it a long time ago, no one wants me, I'm wretched and pathetic and a disgrace to the Malfoy name. After the years father used me as a punching bag and sex toy you think he'd have realised that I understood that by now, but it wasn't enough, it's never e-fucking-nough. Now I have to be violated and humiliated by my classmates as well. What if I killed myself? Would that satisfy you? Would that make everyone happy?" The thoughts that Draco had had burning inside him for so long at last had been expelled; his breathing was deep and heavy, his whole body trembled in anger and exhaustion and as much as he wished they wouldn't, tears flooded down his face as he cursed himself for his outburst.

Silence echoed loudly around the bathroom for what felt like a long time until Draco finally opened his eyes and looked at Harry's reflection through the mirror in front of him. He had a hand clamped loosely over his mouth and his eyes were wide as they stared fearfully at the back of Draco's head.

"I didn't..." His mumbled whispers carried across the thick air and hung there. "I can't... don't..." Draco closed his eyes again and dropped his head shaking it lifelessly, his tears still falling ceaselessly.

"Just leave me alone Potter." His voice was defeated; he didn't have the strength to fight anymore. "Please." He heard the sound of shuffling feet and more broken words before another deafening silence. But the silence was quickly broken.

"I didn't know." Harry's voice was strained and Draco could picture those tears falling from his emerald eyes again. "I'm not leaving you here, alone." There was another shuffle of feet and Draco could feel the heat from Harry's body next to him. "And I don't want you dead." Draco opened his eyes and turned to look at Harry scornfully, tears still falling down both boys faces.

"You hate me Potter, don't deny it, you hate me more than anyone else in this bloody school, you and your little buddies. So don't stand there feigning friendliness and pretending that you care. I can't stand it. I can't..." Draco's anger was finally beginning to give way to the great weights of despair that enveloped him after every attack. His gaze slowly shifted from Harry's face to the floor, tears still tumbling down his cheeks, his voice fading to a strangled whisper. "I can't take it anymore." There was a long, smothering silence as Draco cried uncontrollably, until Harry closed the gap between them so that their bodies were inches apart.

"Don't." He whispered, bringing his hand to Draco's face and gently wiping his tears away with the end of his sleeve. "Don't cry like that." Draco managed to stem the flow of tears, Harry's sleeve wiping the last traces of moisture away from his skin. Harry bent down and retrieved Draco's slightly bloody robes from the floor. "Here." His voice was still that enticing whisper, like nothing could go wrong whilst he was around, and Draco felt himself being lured in to that false sense of security, obediently raising an arm as Harry helped him carefully pull the robes over his head. When he was dressed Harry softly weaved an arm round the Slytherin's waist and pulled his right arm around his own scrawny shoulders. "Come on." And he began to lead the blonde out of the bathroom. Finally Draco found his voice as he shuffled lamely along next to Harry through the dark corridors.

"I'm not going to the hospital wing." He managed, his weight pressed against Harry as he was helped towards a flight of stairs.

"I'm not taking you to the hospital wing, it's alright." And Draco instantly believed him in a way he never believed anyone else; if Harry said it was alright then he knew it would be. After walking up the stairs and through a couple more passageways they came to stop along a deserted corridor standing before a large portrait of a fat lady in a bright pink dress slumped fast asleep in a large chair.

"Tinsel." Harry said quietly and the portrait swung forwards as the woman mumbled to herself in her sleep. Draco looked through the hole in the wall at the red and gold hangings he could just make out in the dim firelight.

"Gryffindor tower?" He asked with a tentative look at Harry. "Are you mad? I'm not going in there either." But the slight pressure that Harry pressed against Draco's waist was enough to urge the Slytherin forwards.

"It's alright; I'm one of the only Gryffindor's staying at the castle this Christmas. As far as I know it's only a hand full of first and second year girls here apart from me, and they'll be asleep by now." Harry helped Draco climb through the portrait hole, the fat lady swinging back into place once they were in, and then helped him up the many steps to his dormitory. Once there he lowered Draco gently onto his bed, a gratified sigh escaping his lips as he made contact with the soft material and the pressure on his body was lessened.

"Do you need anything?" Harry asked looking around the room quickly before turning back to Draco. "A drink or something to eat, maybe some more clothes?"

"Oh, stop fussing," Draco said indifferently lightly rubbing his face with his hands. "I'm fine."

"You're not fine." Harry half shouted, slightly distressed. "Not by any stretch of the imagination." He sat on the bed next to Draco debating putting a caring hand on his shoulder. Draco's face was still buried in his hands as he sighed sadly. Harry leaned closer to the blond, his hand rising to his shoulder and resting there, pulling them closer together. Draco fell tamely into Harry's embrace, not sure why he felt so submissive every time the black haired boy beckoned him to do something. "How can you be so impassive about all this?" The boys voice was pleading and anxious making Draco's heart ache.

"I'm used to it." Draco muttered, the painful truth ripping at his insides as he said it. Harry's grip tightened on his shoulders slightly and Draco found himself nuzzling into the crook of his neck, a wave of exhaustion washing over him. "I just need some sleep." He felt Harry nod against the top of his head as he unravelled his arms from Draco's body and made to stand. The blond held out his arm and pushed Harry back onto the bed roughly, once again resting his head on the boys shoulder. With his hand against Harry's chest he laid onto the mattress bringing the boy with him so they were lying side by side across his bed. Harry was bewildered by the action for a short while before winding his arm under Draco's neck and pulling him closer. The arm Draco had draped across Harry's chest coiled around his middle and they both settled peacefully against one another on the bed. Almost instantly Draco felt himself slipping into unconsciousness.

_Tonight, and just tonight, I'll trust you like I've never trusted anyone before in my life._


	2. Forgotten Hopes

**A/N:** Not as sleep deprived for this chapter. Caught up on my sleep and started writing this as soon as my boyfriend dragged his arse out of bed this morning; didn't want him reading over my shoulder you see, not that I should imagine he'd get very far before being horrified at the all the man love and fleeing in terror, haha!

**Warning: **Contains scenes of child abuse, but I think that's it for the painful bits this chapter, apart from the heart ache, of course!

_**Chapter 2 – Forgotten Hopes**_

"_Father, plea-" But the young boys words were cut short as he let out a loud cry against the pain. A low, satisfied moan let him know that the man on top of him was finished for the night as he hauled himself off the bed and pulled his trousers back on. The six year old curled into a tight ball on the bed sheets and tried to stifle his sobs in his pillow._

"_A Malfoy doesn't cry Draco." His father's voice was annoyed and his words cut into the child like knives but he couldn't stop the tears from flowing. "I said a Malfoy never cries." But as much as the child tried he couldn't stop the tears and he felt a large hand clamp around his wrist and let out a whimper._

"_Father, please, I'm sorry."But he was dragged from the bed and across the floor, onto the landing, down the stairs and across the hall to a large, familiar wooden door. His eyes widened as the door opened to reveal a stone staircase leading into the cellar._

"_You can come out when you've learned how to at least act like a Malfoy." And the man threw the child carelessly through the door so that he tumbled down the stairs with dull thuds. "You're pathetic. I'm disgusted to call you my son."_

Draco's eyes shot open and he bolted upright on the bed, his breathing heavy and strenuous, cold sweat covering his skin. The last images of his father's angry silhouette closing the door and leaving him in darkness left his vision and the pain of the previous nights beating flooded his body. He closed his eyes and brought a hand to his face to wipe away the tears that had spilled during the nightmare. Every night a different one, a different memory, he had enough to haunt him for the rest of his life, and they just kept increasing.

He looked around him then, taking in the way the morning light played off the red and gold drapes hanging around the bed, the posters of Quidditch teams and pictures of families covering the bedside tables in the room. The black haired boy that had fallen asleep next to him was gone and he was completely alone in the room, the silence thundering in his ears.

_Probably came to his senses._ Draco mused dismayed, _woke up next to me and fled the room. I don't blame him, I have to wake up with myself every morning and I wish I could run away._ He smiled sardonically and dragged himself from the bed, walking over to the nearest window and looking out over the grounds. The sun was fairly high, he'd slept reasonably long considering he hardly ever slept at all. It was strange waking up and being able to watch the sun climb in the sky, windows were a luxury he didn't have in his Slytherin bedroom as they all slept in a dungeon. _Still, I wish he'd have stayed._ Draco's features creased with the thought. _Where did that come from?_

The sound of footsteps climbing stairs pulled him from his musings and he turned in time to see the door to the room open, Harry walking through the doorway and stopping when he saw Draco by the window. He had his bag over one shoulder and a bacon sandwich wrapped in a napkin in his hand.

"Oh, you're up." _Disappointed to see me? _Draco studied him gruffly. _Hoped I'd left while you were gone no doubt. Do I really sicken people that much?_

"I brought you some breakfast." Harry said warmly as he crossed the room and put his bag down on the now vacant bed. Draco looked at him confused. _He wanted me to be here? No, he probably brought it for himself and he's covering his tracks, or he did it in some strange sense of obligation, like when you find a stray cat and get stuck with it. No one actually __**wants**__ me around._ Harry was now rifling through his bag which was making sounds like clanking glass. After a few moments he produced a few bottles of liquid and put them on his bed. He then threw his bag on the floor and picked the first bottle up.

"I got this one from Snape's cupboard; the other three are from the hospital wing. They help with bruises and broken bones and stuff." His eyes contemplated the tiny label on the bottle in his hands and he slowly nodded his head. "This one's for bones so I think we should start with this, your wrists swollen and made a cracking sound last night that I really didn't like the sound of." Harry shivered slightly at the thought of it and looked expectantly at Draco. Draco however didn't leave the window and gave Harry a sarcastically quizzical look.

"You expect me to drink something you've pulled from your bag? It could be poison for all I know." He folded his arms across his chest and winced slightly; his wrist really was very tender. "No, I think I'll take my chances without it, I've healed fine before now so I'll be fine without it." Harry looked hurt and slightly taken back, the warm aura that had followed him into the room diminished slightly.

"There you go with that word again; _fine_." Harry crossed the room until he stood in front of Draco, the blond stepping back slightly as he drew nearer. "You are not _fine,_ and you're not going to be _fine_ until you accept that I'm going to help you whether you like it or not, now sit down." Harry surprised himself at how much like Hermione he'd just sounded and smiled inwardly. Draco however didn't move and looked at him reproachfully.

"I'm not your slave." He spat but Harry's eyes narrowed angrily.

"Sit." He ordered firmly and Draco found himself sitting quickly on the edge of the bed, kicking himself for obeying him so quickly. "Now drink this." He thrust the bottle towards Draco and his tone and pose softened. "Please, it will help you heal better." Draco looked at him cynically and snatched the bottle from his out stretched hands. He read the label that was written in Snape's unmistakable handwriting and concluded that the bottle did contain a healing potion, or so the label claimed at least.

_He's mocking me, he has to be, the slimy bastard. It's got to be poison or something. But then I suppose it doesn't really matter, a little more pain and then death; at least I wouldn't have to suffer anymore._ Draco uncorked the small bottle and drained the liquid inside in one mouthful. It burned his throat and tasted like mouldy bread and tar. But as the liquid settled in his stomach he felt a tingling in his wrist and the pain that had been stinging through it nonstop since the night before began to ebb away until all that was left was the tingling. He moved his wrist gingerly and found that it twisted and rotated just as it normally did without any pain shooting through it. _Alright, one bottle down, three more potentially fatal ones to go._

Harry smiled down at him before taking a seat beside him on the bed. He reached for another bottle and picked it up. This one was larger than the last and the liquid inside it was much thicker, almost like a cream. "This one's for bruises, but it's got to be applied externally." He unscrewed the lid and a slightly sweet smell rose from it. He looked at Draco before asking wearily, "Do you want me to do the bruises on you face and back?" Draco scoffed and shrugged slightly.

"If you must, but I think I'll need a lot more than that to cover all of them." A morbid smile crossed Draco's face at his words but Harry just dropped his gaze.

"It's nothing to smile about," He put his fingers inside the bottle and spread some of its contents across his palm. "It's horrible; you shouldn't have been put through that, no one deserves to go through the things you have." He looked up at Draco and froze. The blond was staring at him with a mixture of confusion and an almost childlike sorrow, his eyes wide and glazed with tears, his bottom lip trembling ever so slightly; it broke Harry's heart.

Draco had always been told that he deserved everything he'd ever got; the bruises, the broken bones, the raping, all of it, it had always been his fault and he'd come to terms with that, Harry was clearly lying to him, mocking him, tormenting him with his insincerely kind words. But being told that he didn't deserve it, whether it was a lie or not, was something no one had ever said to him before now. Realising the look on his face and the look he was getting from Harry, he quickly rose from the bed and turned away from him, hurriedly wiping at the tears that were beginning to fall down his face.

"What's wrong?" Harry's tender question stung his insides. "Was it something I said? I'm sorry; I didn't mean to upset you." He felt a hand gently touch his back and flinched at the kindness.

"Don't touch me Potter." His voice was half angry and half pained. "I'm going back to my common room." He managed and turned towards the door.

"You can't." Harry interjected and grabbed at the hem of Draco's robes.

"And why's that?" Anger was rising up in Draco now; he just wanted to get out of here, away from Harry's increasing pity, though he still wasn't sure that it was earnest.

"It was... It was them that hurt you wasn't it? The other Slytherin's?" Draco turned to face him now, the boys fingers still wrapped tightly around his clothes.

"What's your point?" Harry's face creased curiously.

"What's my point? They beat the crap out of you! What's going to stop them doing it again?" Harry's face was filled with anger and concern.

"I'm not that weak Potter, I can fight them off sometimes, it's only when they surprise me that they over power me. Besides, they've had their pound of flesh now; they'll leave me alone, at least for the time being." Draco's expression was laid back as though he'd just explained a simple, well known fact. Harry couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"How can you say that? They'll leave you alone for a while? And then what?" Draco shrugged slightly.

"And then if they can get me, they do it all over again." Harry's eyes widened in fear and disbelief. "Really now Potter, it's not that bad. Its worse at home than when I'm here, I told you I've been worse off than that before, it's been going on for years and hasn't killed me yet as much as I wish it would." Again the words had erupted from his lips before he could stop them and Draco once again kicked himself for revealing so much to the Gryffindor.

Harry's hand slipped from Draco's robes and fell to his side. His eyes were still wide in fearful disbelief and his mouth was parted slightly, trying to form words that wouldn't come. Draco shuffled uncomfortably on his feet briefly before averting his gaze from Harry's and hurrying from the room before he could be stopped.

He thundered down the stairs into the Gryffindor common room and swept quickly across it and out of the portrait hole. His legs carried him swiftly towards the dungeons, afraid to slow down in case he heard the sound of following footsteps. When he finally reached the portrait into his own dormitory he spoke the password and passed hastily into the green and silver common room. He sighed appreciatively, thankful for the familiarity of the place and slowly walked across the carpeted room.

He walked through the doorway in front of him which opened onto a hallway with several doors on either side. Halfway along the corridor he opened one of these doors and walked into his room. The candles that littered the various surfaces in his room immediately sprang to life and covered him in a soft glow. He walked to his trunk and opened it roughly, taking a fresh pair of black trousers and a clean black top from it. He pulled his blood crusted robes over his head and pulled down his trousers gently, only briefly stealing a glimpse at his afflicted body before pulling the fresh clothes on. Once changed he stole a look at his face in the mirror and did the best he could with it, straightening his hair with his hands so it resembled its usual immaculate look, covering as much of his bruised and battered face as he could with his fringe. Mostly satisfied with his appearance he made his way back out of his room and into the common room again intending on heading the bathrooms for a long, hot shower.

"Afternoon Draco." Blaise's voice made the bile in his stomach boil feverishly. "I was wondering where you'd got to. I know you didn't come back here last night because your bed didn't look slept in. I was beginning to think you were still lying on the floor of that filthy classroom." Draco turned to face the infuriating figure by the fire place. He was sat in a squashy arm chair, his eyes fixed on a copy of the _Daily Profit_ that sat on his lap.

"No such luck I'm afraid Blaise." He kept his voice cool and calm and continued across the common room. "I spent the night in bed with a rather attractive black haired beauty if you must know."

"Well bravo you, care to share any details?" Blaise sounded genuinely interested and managed to tear his eyes from the article he was reading, a coy smile on his lips. Draco smirked slightly at him as he reached the portrait hole.

"Sorry, not right now, things to do you know." The portrait hole opened before him to grant him leave.

"I know that look Draco you saucy tart. Was she a virgin?" Draco's smile widened. "She was wasn't she? You lucky bastard." Draco left the room shaking his head slightly at Blaise. It was always like this after an episode, everyone acted like it had never happened and that they were all friends. Crabbe and Goyle went back to being his lackeys, trudging along behind him wherever he went to intimidate the students, Blaise acted like his best friend as they swapped stories and did homework together, and no one was any the wiser to Draco's suffering.

Then days, weeks, and once or twice even months would go past, and Draco would find himself pinned against a wall by his two cronies with Blaise behind him laughing manically. It had always been that way, even at home; all the abuse and suffering kept behind locked doors and on the surface the unwavering portrayal of a perfect, loving family. That's just how his life was, it wasn't going to change and he knew it. Once he left school he'd return home to more abuse and pain. His father would probably set him up with a job with one of his dodgy friends and he'd then get abused by them and his father; that's just the way life had panned out for Draco.

So why did Harry's concerned words sting him so painfully, dredging forgotten hopes and emotions from a place Draco had forced deep inside him years before?


	3. These Things Happen

A/N:** This chapter's a bit shorter than the others but it seemed like a good place to leave it, so I did. And don't worry, things will get better for our favourite Slytherin, just not quite yet *smiles evily***

**Warning:** Contains implied rape scene, angst and angry teenagers, grr!

_**Chapter 3 – These Things Happen**_

It had been four days since Draco had been in the Gryffindor tower. His bruises had become less vivid and were now a dull brown or yellow colour and the cuts that littered his skin had begun to heal. It had also been four days since the Slytherin had had any contact with Harry Potter. Every time he'd seen him or heard his voice he'd turned abruptly in the opposite direction and hidden out of sight at the first opportunity. He wasn't sure why he had been avoiding him so thoroughly but he also had no idea what he was going to say when he finally found himself face to face with him.

Draco was currently sat in the library with a book on Potions spread across his lap and though his eyes were scanning the page, he'd been reading the same line for the past 10 minutes, never taking in more than _and now add boomslang skin._ Sighing heavily he closed the book and put it on the table, pressing his palms deep into his eyes so that little black spots reeled across his vision. The sound of someone sitting heavily in the seat next to him made him pull his hands away and as the spots disappeared and his vision focused he recognised the raven haired boy beside him, a look of sadness on his face, and Draco sighed again and picked up his book.

"To what do I owe the pleasure Potter?" He was surprised at how easily the facade of heartless indifference fell into place; he'd expected this to be a lot harder. He opened his book at the page he'd been reading and began to once again read the words without actually taking them in.

"Have you been avoiding me?" Harry's innocence and naivety almost made Draco smile, but he managed to roll his eyes vaguely as he turned the page and sighed.

"And why would I try to avoid you Potter? I have got better things to do with my day." And he did have better things to do, but he still spent most of his time looking over his shoulder to make sure Harry wasn't coming up behind him.

"Oh." Draco could see Harry's gaze drop to his lap and was torn between smirking as he usually would and feeling angry at himself for making the Gryffindor feel stupid when he was completely correct. "Well, how have you been?" His gaze returned to Draco's face with a concerned look and Draco stared more intently at his book, afraid of looking up and loosing himself in those striking green eyes.

"I was doing fine until you turned up, but now I feel slightly ill." Again he felt angry at himself for being such an arse, but this was just how it's supposed to be; everything always went back to normal after the abuse, why was Harry being so stubbornly different?

"Why are you being like this?" His voice was pained and Draco found himself staring even more intently at the page to try and block the boy out. "After everything that happened, I..." Harry's words caught in his throat as he struggled to continue. "I thought things had changed between us, I thought you needed a friend."

"You take things far too personally, did you know that Potter?" Draco was now staring so hard at the book on his lap he was almost surprised when it didn't burst into flames.

"Too personally?" The Gryffindor's voice was strained and angry. "How can you say that,_ too personally?_ You were attacked by people that call themselves your friends and you're acting like nothing happened!" Harry's voice rose dangerously and Draco quickly scanned the area around them for students that might be listening in.

"And I'd appreciate you keeping that little scuffle to yourself and not shouting it out for the whole of Hogwart's to hear." Draco hissed between clenched teeth as he rose quickly from his chair, the book falling from his lap with a thud.

"Scuffle?" It appeared that Harry had a problem with repeating everything Draco said which pissed the blond off even more. "You can't call what happened that night a scuffle!" Harry lowered his voice and took half a step towards the Slytherin. "They raped and beat you half to death, why aren't you taking this more seriously?"

Draco's fingers clenched into angry white fists as he closed the gap between them so that their faces were inches apart. "I do take it seriously, look at me, it's not something I can ignore you know, but these things happen and I've learned to deal with it so I suggest you either do the same or forget the whole thing entirely." Not wanting to draw more attention to himself or do something to Harry's face he might regret Draco stormed past him and out of the library; his hands still tight balls at his sides, his fingernails digging dangerously into his skin.

"Malfoy, wait." Harry was running up the corridor behind him and Draco quickened his step, but the Gryffindor grabbed hold on his robes and spun him round so they faced each other. "I'm not about to forget what I saw, I think that nights been burned into my memory forever. But I'm not willing to just roll over and accept that 'these things happen' either." His voice softened as he looked deeply into Draco's face, the blond averting his gaze in fear of being pulled into those vivid emerald eyes. "I want to help you."

"Well you can't." Draco straightened himself up and looked back into Harry's eyes maliciously. "So I suggest that you get on with your happy little life and leave me to deal with mine." Draco wrenched his robes from Harry's grasp and turned away from him, heading back down the corridor.

"Draco." Harry's voice pleaded and a pained look crossed Draco's features, his pace slowing slightly, but he still continued down the hall away from him.

"Just leave me alone Potter." He said the sentence with as much conviction and bitterness as he could manage, his eyes the only thing revealing that he didn't mean a word of it, but he quickly rounded a corner and began sprinting towards the nearest staircase, taking the steps two at a time until he reached another deserted corridor and stopped, panting slightly, tears stinging at his eyes.

"You and Potter have gotten close." Blaise' voice drawled from behind him and Draco turned to see his smirking face staring back at him. "That little outburst almost sounded like a lovers tiff." He laughed cynically at his own joke and Draco's face screwed up in anger.

"Screw you Blaise." Draco turned to leave but a hand clasped around his wrist, another grabbing at his hair and he was thrown painfully against a wall to his right, Blaise pushing against him with his body to hold him there. "Get off me!" Draco shouted but Blaise merely pulled him a few inches from the stone wall and slammed the side of head into it causing his vision to blur and his head to throb menacingly. In the few moments Draco was too disoriented to fight back Blaise had dragged him behind a statue a little way along the corridor and into a small alcove hidden from the hallway and prying eyes. Blaise withdrew his wand and cast a quick silencing spell on the opening to their hiding place before turning his wand on Draco, ropes immediately binding his wrists together.

Blaise put his wand back in his pocket and began to run his hands up Draco's torso in yearning. This seemed to bring Draco out of his stupor and he began to struggle at the ropes that bound him. Blaise just laughed, his fingers working quickly at removing Draco's trousers.

"Honestly, I don't know why you struggle. I know you love the things I do to you, it would go much smoother if you just give in." He spun Draco around forcefully so that his chest was against the wall and pinned him there with one arm, his free hand working feverishly at his own trouser clasp. "You're not as strong as you might pretend to be Draco and I know it." Draco's flailing subsided slightly as Blaise brought his face to Draco's ear and lowered his voice to a malevolent whisper. "You're weak, you're pathetic, you're disgusting, and you know it." Draco's eyes closed as the words cut into him painfully and all his struggling ceased. Blaise's smile widened. "There's a good boy." He cooed before continuing with his assault on the trembling blond beneath him.

Some twenty minutes later Harry was wandering the corridors on the seventh floor, his eyes staring at the ground as he walked without a destination, his mind mulling over everything that had happened and been said. As he rounded a corner he knocked into someone and both of them stumbled backwards. Harry was halfway to apologising before he realised the boy he'd knocked into. Blaise sneered at him menacingly.

"Watch yourself Potter; you don't want to make me angry now do you? Someone might get hurt." He flicked his hair out of his face and straightened himself out.

"Is that a threat?" Harry retorted, his fists clenched as he took a step towards Blaise, meeting his challenge.

"Of sorts, but I wouldn't dream of hurting the 'Golden Boy', you'd run crying straight to the teachers and then I'd just get in trouble. No, why hurt you when I can hurt others?" His sneer broadened into a sadistic grin and Harry's eyes widened with realisation.

"It's you isn't it? You're the one hurting Draco!" His voice shook with anger and he advanced on the Slytherin, his fists still clenched, no thought of using a wand going through his mind; he wanted to rip him limb from limb.

"Now, now Potter, you might want to turn your enthusiasm to finding your boyfriend, when I left him a short while ago he wasn't looking too good." Harry stopped in his tracks as Blaise pouted mockingly at him. "I saw your little lover's quarrel when you left the library, Draco looked very upset so I tried to console him, but I don't think he appreciated my help. He did do an awful lot of crying, but it was on the floor rather than my shoulder, didn't want to get my robes dirty after all."Blaise turned away and hurried along the corridor laughing to himself. Harry tensed, his breath caught in his throat.

He ran hastily down the hall that Blaise had come from, opening classroom doors and calling Draco's name as he went. He stopped when he reached a cross section, trying to decide which way to turn, when the sound of a muffled sob caught his attention a little way down the corridor. He walked quietly towards the noise, not able to see anyone. As he reached a statue next to an empty classroom he heard the sob again coming from a niche in the wall. He looked round the statue and caught sight of a pair of legs sprawled haphazardly in the small space behind it. Pushing past the statue he dashed into the crevice and gasped at the scene before him.


	4. I'll Be Your Hero

**A/N:** This chapters a little happier than the others, figured it was time I gave the two wizards a break *laughs evilly* shorter than I'd have liked it to be but I'll start the next chapter right away!

_**Chapter 4 – I'll Be Your Hero**_

Draco was sprawled awkwardly in the cramped space, his legs out in front of him and his back slumped against the corner. Blood trickled down his face from the gash on his head and mixed with his tears, his robes were torn and hung limply from his half naked body to reveal bloody claw marks and fresh bruises covering his skin. When he saw Harry appear in the entrance he tried desperately to pull his tattered clothes around him and hide himself away. _You're weak, you're pathetic, you're disgusting, and you know it._ The words echoed through his head and he buried his face in his hands.

"Draco," The pain in Harry's voice made Draco's heart ache and when the Gryffindor stretched out a hand to touch his trembling shoulder Draco recoiled sharply, whimpering slightly. "I'm sorry, this is my fault." He didn't try to touch Draco again and instead watched his shaking body dejectedly. "I'm so sorry."

"Don't," Draco said roughly, his throat dry from crying. "Don't look at me, I'm hideous."

"No you're not." Harry protested, but Draco cut him off shaking his head.

"Don't patronise me, I know what I am. I'm a monster, a repulsive wretch." Draco's voice quivered and his sobbing increased as he grabbed handfuls of his blond hair and began pulling at it, his face angry and defeated. "I'm obnoxious and cruel and spiteful and I'd be exactly like my father if I wasn't so damned pathetic." He was now pulling out chunks of hair and hitting his head against the wall behind him.

"Stop it Draco," Harry threw his arms protectively around Draco's shoulders and waist and pulled him away from the wall so he'd stop hurting himself. "Please stop it." Draco's hands left his head and he began trying to prise Harry's arms from round him.

"Let go of me." Draco cried as he continued to struggle in Harry's arms. "I said let go!" He punched Harry in the ribs and the boy gasped but his grip didn't loosen, he just pulled the Slytherin closer to him.

"I'm not letting go, I won't see you punish yourself for what other people have done to you." Slowly Draco's attempts to free himself diminished until he was just crying hysterically into Harry's shoulder, his hands gripping tightly at the front of the Gryffindor's robes. Harry continued to hug him tenderly, rocking him slightly back and forth and shushing in his ear. Gradually Draco's cries subsided and he just rested in Harry's embrace, not wanting to leave those comforting arms.

The sound of footsteps hurrying through the corridor beyond them made them look towards the patch of light streaming into their hidden cove. There was a girlish laugh and the footsteps died away leaving Harry and Draco at peace once again.

"Come on," Harry whispered as he turned back to look at Draco. "Let's go somewhere where we won't get interrupted." Draco nodded and wiped the tears from his face on the back of his sleeve before Harry helped him stand. They walked into the deserted corridor and Harry took a quick look around to get his bearings before heading to their left. They passed down a couple more passageways until Harry paused and turned to Draco. "Wait here." Draco nodded passively and leaned against the wall as Harry began to pace the stretch of floor in front of him. Draco was about to ask him what he was doing when a door materialised between the two portraits where Harry had been walking. Draco's eyes widened slightly and Harry smiled, opening the newly formed door and beckoning Draco to follow.

The room reminded Draco of a slightly better furbished version of Hagrid's hut. There was a large double bed against one wall with a thick duvet that looked very welcoming. In one corner there were a couple of armchairs with a small wooden table in between them; beside those was a fireplace with a kettle sat on the mantle next to two jars marked 'tea' and 'sugar', a couple of mugs hung from little pegs by their handles on the wall just behind. There was a door the other side of the bed that Harry approached and opened. Draco walked next to him and saw a small bathroom with a shower, toilet and sink. Although the two rooms were small, they were cosy, like a little cottage set somewhere in the country, and Draco almost smiled at the thought.

"Where are we?" Draco asked as Harry led him to sit on the bed, which was every bit as comfortable as he'd imagined.

"It's called the Room of Requirement; it turns into whatever you need at the time. I asked it for somewhere safe and comfortable, somewhere you could come and be away from everything." Harry smiled at him and sat beside him on the bed looking around the room. "A little safe haven of sorts. I think it's outdone its self this time." Draco nodded vaguely, his eyes scanning the room but glancing at Harry every so often.

"I'm sorry I hit you." He blurted out in a whisper, his eyes trained on the hands in his lap.

"It's ok, you were upset, I understand. I know you didn't want me to touch you but," Harry took a deep breath and sighed. "But I couldn't stand watching you hurt yourself like that."

"I've done worse before." Draco bit his tongue and screwed up his eyes; why did he have this unexplainable habit of blurting out secrets to the boy he's hated for so many years? A hand was placed on Draco's arm causing him to open his eyes and look into Harry's concerned face. _Why must he look at me like that? It feels like I'm falling._

"Talk to me, help me understand. I want to help you." Draco shook his head, warmth radiated from the hand that still rested on his arm.

"You really do have a 'helping people thing' if you want to help me." Harry's grip tightened around Draco's arm and he sighed. "I don't get you Potter. Why, after everything that's gone on between us, do you want to waste your time trying to help someone like me?" The warmth gave in to a bitter coldness as Harry's hand drew back causing a shiver to creep up Draco's spine.

"I..." Harry was wringing his hands nervously in his lap, his gaze had fallen to the floor, searching. "I think... I guess I..." His cheeks were flushing red as he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, Draco looking at him quizzically. "I like you." He turned to look at Draco tentatively; his cheeks still red and bashful, Draco just looked confused. "I mean, I think I have a kinda... I kinda fancy you, a bit, I guess." His gaze dropped quickly back to the carpet, a layer of sweat covered his palms and his cheeks reddened further. Draco continued to look at him bewildered before he snorted a laugh.

"You really are as crazy as they say you are." Harry turned to look at him slightly pained.

"Look, I can't help how I feel ok?" Harry returned to looking at his lap. "It's just over the past week or so I've grown kind of... attracted to you, I guess." Draco snorted another laugh, a smile playing at his lips.

"Oh yes, because I'm very attractive, the bruises and broken bones practically radiate beauty." He rolled his eyes and shook his head; that smile still across his face, unaware that Harry had now turned to face him looking angry and shocked. "And who wouldn't be attracted to a rape victim? Though I suppose the sex wouldn't be a problem, I've been thoroughly broken in-"

"Stop it!" Harry shouted causing Draco to whip his head round. Harry was on his feet, his fists clenched. "Don't say those things, its horrible! How can you talk about it like that, like its some big joke?" Draco was taken aback by his sudden anger at Draco's comment; he didn't understand what all the fuss was about.

"I think you're taking this too seriously Potter." Harry let out an angry cry and turned towards the fireplace.

"How can I not? What's happening to you _is_ serious and you keep just brushing it off like you're being teased instead of violently attacked." Draco paused before he rose from the bed and slowly walked up behind Harry. His shoulders were tense as he leant against the fireplace with his back to Draco. The blond took a deep breath and placed a hand tentatively on Harry's shoulder making him spin round, their bodies inches from one another.

"Look, my whole life these, _things,_ have been happening to me. I learned to shrug them off a long time ago, because if I hadn't I don't know what I'd have done." His gaze dropped as Harry's eyes pierced through to his soul, searching in all the hidden corners where Draco had stashed his painful memories. "If I don't act like they mean nothing to me then I'd fall apart, you've seen me. If I let it get to me I'd be like that all the time and I wouldn't be able to handle it." Harry's hands rose and cupped Draco's face gently lifting it so they were looking at each other once again.

"You've got me now; you don't have to suffer alone. I can be here for you as long as you need me to be." Draco smiled sadly, Harry's eyes warm and comforting. And then he felt himself being pulled gently towards Harry and before he knew what was happening he'd been pulled into a soft kiss. His eyes closed against the touch and he just managed to stifle a moan. He didn't realise how much he'd been craving this but now it was happening he knew he'd wanted it for a long time. As the kiss deepened he found himself wanting to touch Harry, to caress him, and his hands wandered slowly up the Gryffindor's chest. He wanted to push Harry against the wall, grind against him, rip his clothes off and bite into his neck lustfully. Then his father's sadistic smile swam before his eyes and spoke, _now __**that's**__ the Malfoy way._

Draco quickly pushed Harry away from him with such force the boy hit the wall behind him. "Don't touch me!" Draco shouted and turned away from him pacing the floor. He was just as sick and twisted as his father.

"I'm sorry," Harry's voice was strangled and Draco turned to look at him and was confused to him close to tears and clearly horrified with himself. "I wasn't thinking, I'm so stupid. After everything you've been through, I just didn't think, I'm so sorry." He folded his arms across his chest defensively and shook his head, furious at himself, and Draco realised that Harry thought it was him who was in the wrong. Draco's anger left him and he crossed the room to stand in front of Harry again, placing a hand on each of his shoulders.

"Don't apologise, it's not you." Harry went to speak but Draco cut him off. "No, listen to me. I-I want you to kiss me, and I want to kiss you back." He sighed, his grip on Harry's shoulder's loosening. "But I want to do other things as well, things that-" His teeth clenched and he glared at the wall behind Harry's head. "Things that my father would do, and it sickens me." He turned back to Harry, his expression softening. "I don't want to hurt you, I don't even want to think about hurting you, that's why I pushed you away, you didn't do anything wrong, ok?" Harry uncrossed his arms and put a hand to Draco's cheek.

"You're nothing like your father Draco." A dry half-laugh escaped Draco's lips as a sad smile etched his face.

"Yes I am, more than you know." Tears brimmed in his eyes but Harry shook his head.

"You don't have to be." He closed the gap between them and once again kissed Draco's lips tenderly. The blond moaned this time, giving himself over to the longing he'd been feeling for so long. His hands weaved into Harry's hair and down his back pulling the boy closer. Harry's tongue prodded questioningly against Draco's lips and he parted them as they both slipped their tongues into each other's mouths. A burning heat rose in Draco but he forced any thoughts about what he might like to do to the Gryffindor out of his mind and resigned himself to let Harry take the lead.

The kiss deepened and Draco found himself backing up towards the bed. As his ankles hit the wooden frame he fell back onto the soft mattress, his grip on Harry tightening and causing the boy to fall on top of him, but their lips never parted. Draco moved further up the bed so that he was laying on it without his feet dangling off the end and Harry had to climb onto the bed and put his knees either side of Draco's hips to make himself more comfortable. Both their hands began to wander; Harry's left stayed on the bed by Draco's head to steady himself, his other hand moving gingerly across the blonde's chest. Draco's left hand held Harry's hair not letting him move his head whilst his other hand began to move under Harry's robes and across his skin, the skinny but muscular chest feeling good against his fingers. Harry let out a soft moan making Draco smile.

He pulled both his hands to the raven haired boy's robes and began to pull them over his head, Harry obliging him with a slight blush on his cheeks. He then propped himself up on one elbow and began to pull his own robes off. He threw the clothes on the floor and turned to Harry who now sat on his lap with his legs either side of him. A pained look was on his face and his eyes traced Draco's now naked torso, his fingers tracing sad lines across his bruised and battered skin.

"I'm so sorry." He whispered, his eyes still taking in the damaged body before him.

"Don't be, it's not your fault." Harry's eyebrows furrowed slightly as his fingers traced more lines and he let out a sad sigh.

"I didn't realise just how skinny you were, or how many scars you had." His voice was still barely a whisper and Draco looked down at his own body, disgusted by what he saw.

"Yes, it can be quite hard to see through all the bruising, but some scars show up better than others." He smiled cynically at himself and turned away, unable to keep looking at the flesh that offended him and so many others. Harry pulled his body slightly higher up Draco's so that he was almost sitting on his stomach and continued to look at Draco's torso, swallowing a hard lump as the deeper he looked the more scars became visible to him, telltale signs to the years of abuse he'd suffered.

Draco glanced at him before turning away again and staring into the fire. "I don't know how you can look at me, let alone want to touch me." He'd spent so long having people looking at him with nothing but animal lust or disappointment in their eyes it was hard for him to understand Harry's concern and sadness. The Gryffindor's palms lay flat against Draco's stomach and gently caressed their way upwards along his chest and neck and finally resting either side of his jaw causing Draco to intake a slow, sharp breath.

"I could look at you all day, touch you all day," Draco turned his eyes to finally look at Harry who was smiling softly at him, a look that made Draco's heart melt. "There's nothing, _nothing_, I find even vaguely off-putting about you." He sighed, his gaze again returning to Draco's bruises. "I just wish I didn't have to see you in so much pain." Draco smiled sadly and brought a hand up to Harry's cheek, cupping it gently before bringing him into a quick kiss.

"Thank you." He whispered before kissing him again, deeper this time, trying to convey all the emotions he couldn't express in words. Harry leaned in to him, his arms tightening around the skinny waist and back of the Slytherin. Their hands began to wander once more, Harry's gripping at Draco's platinum hair, and Draco's taking in the smooth touch of Harry's chest and stomach, slowly moving down towards his trousers. Harry gasped slightly as Draco's fingers moved beneath his waist band and the blond looked into his eyes longingly. "Fuck me?" The question was sincere and quiet and almost childlike except for its meaning and Harry found himself at a loss for what to say or do.

"I... I don't know if I can. I've never done this before, and you... you're..." The words caught in his throat and Draco's face twisted into a look of confusion and hurt. "After everything Blaise has done to you, I don't know if I can-" He was cut off as Draco's hand pressed against his chest and threw him off his body. The Slytherin swung his legs over the side of the bed and gripped the sheets angrily.

"Its fine, I get it Potter." Harry looked at him, confused by his anger. "Who'd want Blaise's cast off's? Not to mention the things my father's done to me, I wouldn't want to go near me either." Harry shook his head and got to his knees, putting his hands on Draco's shoulders only to have the blond brush him away. "Get off me Potter."

"Draco, stop it, listen to me." He put his hands on Draco's shoulders again, the blond trying to push him away, but he snaked his arms quickly around his chest and pulled the Slytherin towards him across the bed. "Listen to me!" Draco stopped struggling against him and lay defeated across Harry's lap, looking anywhere but at his face. "That's not what I meant," Draco went to cut in but Harry continued. "No, listen. What I meant was, after everything you've been through, after what Blaise put you through no more than two hours ago, I didn't want to-" he paused running a hand through Draco's hair. "I don't want to hurt you. I've not done this before, I don't know how to do _it_ properly and I don't want to hurt you because I've no idea what I'm doing." He sighed as Draco finally turned to face him, his expression softer.

"You're not going to hurt me, you're nothing like them." Draco lifted a hand to Harry's head and wound it round his neck, pulling him into a kiss. "I want you to have me, to take me like _they_ do, but nothing at all like they do at the same time. I want to be yours, and only yours, to have you touch me like I've been touched before but in a completely different way. I-" He sighed, a sad smile across his lips. "I want you, so much."

Harry pulled the blond further onto the bed and climbed on top of him again, his knees either side of his hips on the mattress. He began to kiss his jaw line, then moved to his neck, and then slowly down his chest, causing a long moan to escape Draco's mouth, his back arching slightly. His nimble fingers moved to Draco's trousers and undone them quickly, sliding them down the Slytherin's pale legs and onto the floor. Draco moved his hands to Harry's waist and did the same, throwing Harry's trousers on top of his own on the floor. He could see the nervous look on his face as Harry swallowed and smiled slightly.

"It's ok," He pulled the Gryffindor slightly higher up his lap and slipped his boxers down his slender legs. "It's going to be fine." Harry smiled back at him and nodded, the Slytherin laying back against the pillows as Harry began planting kisses across his stomach again. He moved further down his body until he was kissing Draco's skinny inner thighs causing the blond to moan in delight. He shifted his body and removed his boxers, positioning himself between Draco's legs and looking questioningly up into his eyes. Draco nodded at him, giving him his consent, and Harry's hands lifted Draco's legs higher to better position himself as he pressed his hard cock between his thighs.

Draco gasped slightly, biting his lower lip, causing Harry to stop and look at him worriedly. The Slytherin just brought his hands up to Harry's hips and pulled him closer, forcing him inside with a satisfied groan. Harry lowered his body over Draco's, bringing their lips together as he began to slowly grind their bodies together. Draco wrapped his arms around the Gryffindor's back as Harry's kisses moved to his neck. The grinding grew steadily quicker, but still remained gentle and loving and Draco moaned lustfully in the black haired boy's ear.

The flash of a sneering, blond haired face passed before Draco's eyes. He screwed his face up as he concentrated on pushing his father from his thoughts. _This isn't like that, this is nothing like that._ Harry thrust against him again, his lips kissing softly at the nape of his neck. A dark skinned boy laughed dryly in his head and Draco gently dug his nails into Harry's back as Blaise's face swam before his eyes. _Stop it, he's different, he's not like you._ Harry groaned into his ear and a sharp pain shot up Draco's back. He bit his tongue to stop from crying out; he didn't want Harry to stop, he wanted this and he wasn't going to be tormented into stopping.

Moments later both boys let out soft cries; Draco's back arching and Harry's fingers tightening around the bed sheets at the pleasure they both felt. Slowly relaxing Harry fell onto the mattress beside Draco, both boys panting slightly but with satisfied smiles on their faces. Harry's eyes opened and he gazed at the sweaty Slytherin beside him, his chest rising and falling sharply as he faced the ceiling, his eyes closed.

"Are you alright?" Harry whispered and Draco's smile widened slightly as he nodded slowly.

"I've never been better." He whispered back and rolled onto his side to face Harry, wrapping his arms around the boy's neck. Harry curled his arms round Draco's waist and they lay against each other, their breathing still slightly fast, sweat glistening from both of them, and together they slipped off into a light sleep.


	5. Broken And Bleeding

**A/N:** I'm a horrible, horrible person, I know it's been ages since I updated and I'm really, really sorry. I've been preoccupied trying to sort my life out over the last week or so and my depressions started setting in, plus it's been really hard for me to write for some reason, only been able to do a few paragraphs at a time, though when it got towards the end it flowed better I think. Again, I'll try to update as soon as possible, I'm gonna make a start on the next chapter right away whilst I've got my flow back.

**Warning:** Sexual and physical abuse in abundance and the mention of self harm.

_**Chapter 5 – Broken and Bleeding**_

_He was surrounded, a group of five or so bodies pressing down on him, they're faces twisted into merciless smiles. They're hands scrapped and tore at Draco's flesh, they burned and froze and stabbed and clawed and the pain was excruciating. He screamed, their smiles widened, their attacks worsened. He flailed madly against them trying to push them away but unable to touch them. "It hurts, stop it!" He cried and then his hand came in contact with flesh and his fingers tightened around a throat. The smiles continued to twist and widen, unperturbed by Draco's attempts to throw them off. "Let go of me!" He shouted, but their attack continued, Draco's grip on his captor tightening fruitlessly. "Please, stop hurting me!" Tears welled in his eyes, the pain was unbearable. _

"No!" He cried again and the scene before him swam and melted away. The twisted smiles vanished and were replaced by another face, a pained face. His fingers were wrapped around their neck, choking the black haired boy in front of him, his green eyes beginning to roll back in his head as he struggled to breathe and prise the fingers from his throat. Draco's eyes widened and he released his grip, Harry falling to the mattress beside him coughing and spluttering, clutching at his neck and forcing air into his lungs.

"Oh god, oh god." Draco scrambled to his knees beside Harry as he rolled onto his side and continued to wretch and cough. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, oh god what have I done?" Draco became hysterical, his eyes darting around the room looking for help that wasn't there; he didn't know what to do, what to think. _**You nearly killed him. **_A voice inside his head hissed; his father's voice. _No, no, I didn't mean to! I didn't mean to!_ He grabbed at his hair and began pulling at it, his eyes wide with fear as he looked at the trembling boy before him still coughing into the sheets. Harry reached out a hand and grasped at Draco's elbow pulling his hand away from his head.

"Stop it," He croaked, coughing again before turning to face Draco and pulling his other hand away from his hair. "Stop it Draco, it was an accident." Draco shook his head, tears falling down his cheeks.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, oh God, I'm so sorry." He reached out to Harry but stopped himself, not wanting to hurt or scare him, and buried his face in his hands beginning to rock back and forth. Harry managed to sit up, his arms trembling, and he pulled Draco into a tight hug, the other boy sobbing frantically.

"It's ok, it was a nightmare, you didn't mean it. Please, calm down." He coughed again, his throat aching painfully. Draco pulled away from him slightly and looked at Harry's neck, angry red finger marks were still there, imprints of his hands, bruising to a dark purple already. His face screwed up as fresh tears spilled and he gently brought a shaking hand to the raw skin.

"I'm so sorry, you must hate me. I told you I was evil, I can't be trusted; I'm just like him, even in my sleep. Oh God Harry, I'm so sorry." He placed a hand gingerly behind the Gryffindor's head; his fingers laced in his hair, and continued to cry against his shoulder. Harry coughed roughly, still rocking the shaking Slytherin, and stroked his back soothingly.

"I don't hate you, it was an accident." He tried to steady his quivering voice; it was hoarse and hurt to talk, but he wouldn't let Draco punish himself further. "And you're not evil," He pulled the boy from his shoulder and rested their foreheads against one another; Draco's grey eyes were more pained than Harry had ever seen them. "I could never think that." He brought his hand to Draco's face and wiped at his tears, the blond calming down with his soothing words. "Stop being so hard on yourself, ok?" Draco nodded slightly, closing his eyes and taking a deep, quivering breath.

Harry leant forwards and planted a soft kiss on his lips causing a small smile to edge across Draco's face. Harry gently pushed them onto the mattress leaning against the pillows with Draco's head on his chest, his arms wrapped tightly around the blonde's neck. One of Draco's arms snaked round Harry's waist, the other rested gently on his chest as he lay beside the Gryffindor on the mattress, his breathing steadying though still a little ragged. Harry was running his hands through his blond hair, his lips pressed against the top of his head. He cleared his throat painfully and Draco lifted his head to look into his emerald eyes. His lips parted as he made to apologise again but Harry cut him off with a soft kiss.

"Don't." He whispered, smiling soothingly as he pressed another kiss to Draco's forehead. Draco smiled, closing his eyes against the soft touch, and again rested his head on Harry's chest, tracing small circles on his bare skin with his thumb. They laid in each other's embrace for a long while, content in the silence, Draco's eyes closed and Harry's eyes glazed as he stared into the distance.

Slowly Harry's eyes focused and he looked down at the boy in his arms, smiling. His gaze drifted down to the boys back and his smile slowly slid from his face. The scars that littered Draco's body burned as a painful reminder to all the abuse he'd suffered and Harry felt his heart drop behind his ribcage to somewhere in the region of his stomach. He lowered his hand from the boy's neck and began to trace the more prominent scars with his finger tips. Large, angry red scars spanned the length and width of his back; there were ten or fifteen of them, reaching from his shoulders to his waist line and from his left to his right side. They were obviously years old but thick and bright against his pale skin causing Harry to sigh as he imagined the agony they must have caused. He felt Draco shift slightly on top of him as he took in a deep breath.

"I was ten when my father gave me those." Draco replied quietly to the question that had been on the tip of Harry's tongue but that he'd never dream of asking. "I'd recently discovered that if I cut myself it took away some of the pain I felt inside and gave me some sense of control over my life." Harry stiffened slightly and Draco turned the arm that was on Harry's chest around so that his under arm showed, and Harry noticed the pale scars that ran in neat, horizontal lines across it from his wrist to his elbow, barely visible against Draco's equally pale skin. "Father found me one day in the bathroom, bleeding into the sink. He was furious." Draco smiled sadly against Harry's chest and he felt Harry's grip tighten in his hair. "He took me to the cellar and told me that if I was going to bleed I might as well do it properly. He took a whip from thin air and... well, I think you can tell what he did." Harry pressed another kiss to the top of Draco's head as he turned his arm back over and ran his hand across Harry's stomach.

"Oh, Draco." And those were the only words Harry could manage, the pain and anger inside him threatening to bubble over at the thought of Draco suffering at his father's hand as young as ten. He hugged Draco's suddenly frail body to his own and pressed another kiss to his head, at a complete loss at what else to do.

"It's alright," Draco whispered, the hand on Harry's stomach moving slowly up and down his body. "It's not the worst he's put me through." Harry's eyebrows furrowed sadly at Draco's offhanded voice. The blond rolled over slightly but stayed pressed against Harry's side, and traced a finger over some scars on his stomach and side. "These are dog bites," He stated unfazed as Harry's eyes fixed on the teeth marks scarred into his flesh despite his want to turn away and never have to look again. "Father got a dog, a Rottweiler I think. We didn't need the added protection on the Manor, but father always did like the outward look of power that things like guard dogs brought. One day, a week or so after getting the beast, father was in his study with a bottle of firewhisky. He was never a nice man, as you've guessed, but alcohol made him forget any vague morals or ethics he'd have had when he was sober; such as the need to keep up appearances or keep his son from dying. I only walked past, but my presence alone was enough to anger him it seemed. He came out of his study and grabbed me by the hair, dragging me to the cellar as he so frequently did. I could tell he was more drunk than usual, he never swayed quite so much as he did that day, that's probably why he used the dog, unable to see clearly enough to exact his punishment on me himself."

Harry wrapped his arms as tightly around the blond as he dared without breaking him in half as he paused in his story. "He threw me down the stairs of the cellar and shut the door. I thought that was all he was going to do at first, foolishly. Moments later, before I'd even had a chance to lift myself from the floor, the door was open again and he kicked the dog down the stairs after me. Needless to say the animal wasn't impressed by its mistreatment, but as the door was closed brusquely behind it, it turned its attention to the only other person in the room." He paused in his story again, turning back to Harry so that their bodies touched as much of each other as they could, but his gaze stayed fixedly at a spot on the wall as he knew he'd burst into tears if he looked into Harry's pained eyes. "It felt like a life time that I was trapped in that room, running and hiding as best as I could, though the animal managed to get a hold of me eventually. I thought I was going to die then; it got me in its jaws and shook me like a rag doll. I screamed, I think, I don't really remember, but the cellar door opened and my mother came running down, her wand out, and she shot a stunning curse at the dog causing it to finally drop me. She's never cared much for me, I'm pretty sure the only reason she had a child was to continue the Malfoy name as was expected; that's probably why she saved me that day, something she'd never done before or since, I just don't think she could go through with having another child again, too much effort. As far as they're both concerned I'm worthless, a complete disappointment. I don't know what I did so early on in life but that's how they've always been towards me; whether its mother ignoring my existence completely, or father doing everything in his power to ruin me, its always been the same. I'm wretched, ugly, tainted, unwanted-"

"Stop it." Harry's voice was barely a whisper, Draco had almost forgotten he was there, and when he turned to look at him he was horrified to see the tears that tumbled down his cheeks. "You're none of those things Draco, don't let anyone convince you otherwise." Draco buried his head in Harry's neck as they clung to each other hungrily. "You've never done a thing wrong." He pressed a long kiss to Draco's head and cried softly into his hair, Draco's own tears spilling onto Harry's shoulder. "I wish I could take it away Draco, I wish I could take away everything you've been through, and it hurts so much knowing I can't." Draco's arms tightened around Harry's middle as his tears began to ease. "But I can help you now, I won't see you get hurt again, I'll do everything in my power to protect you." He pulled Draco's head from his shoulder and their eyes locked in a silent promise before Harry pressed a long, gentle kiss to Draco's lips.

~*~*~*~

Over the next couple weeks Draco and Harry stole as many moments together as possible, the room of requirement their safe haven from the world outside. As Draco became happier in himself he began to put weight back on, much to Harry's relief, and started to let his true self shine through. He smiled more often, not just at Harry but at others too, and a side of Malfoy that had never been seen before began to flourish as he felt what it was to truly love someone and be loved back.

Though the scars of Draco's past, both physical and emotional, were taking a much longer time to heal. Draco adamantly refused to penetrate Harry for fear of hurting him, of turning into his father, of losing control, and of a hundred other things he wasn't quite sure of. He often woke from nightmares screaming into the dark, and was glad of the nights when Harry was by his side in the bed in the room of requirement to comfort him and ease him back into sleep. It was when he was around Harry that he was most at ease, when he could finally drop his barrier of the obnoxious, self-obsessed Malfoy and be who he really wanted to be; kind, helpful and happy.

It was a sunny winter's day outside and there was a thick layer of snow on the ground as Draco made his way towards the seventh floor from the Slytherin dormitory. He was looking out the window, smiling absently as he watched a group of first year Hufflepuff girls having a snowball fight, when hands roughly grabbed him by his upper arms and dragged him through a door to his left. He caught a quick glance of desks and a black board before he was thrown roughly to the floor with a thud. He heard the door slam shut behind him as he struggled to get to his feet, and Blaise's voice as he locked it and put a silencing charm around it.

Draco, now on his feet, turned to face Blaise, expecting that coy sneer on his face and was taken aback to see his features twisted in anger.

"And where do you think you're going?" He spat the words like venom and Draco's face twitched involuntarily; he'd never seen Blaise like this before, he'd always just seemed sadistically happy at having Draco cornered in a room with no escape, he'd never been angry, in fact Draco was sure he'd never seen him this angry in his life. Draco quickly plastered his most contemptuous sneer across his face and folded his arms across his chest in an almost relaxed manner.

"Unlike you Blaise, I do actually have things I could be _doing_ with my spare time." Blaise's eyes narrowed maliciously and he took half a step forward.

"Or people, so I hear." Again Draco's face twitched and a vindictive smirk crossed Blaise's mouth. "Don't think I haven't seen you and _Potter_ prancing about the hallways together." He said Harry's name with such hatred Draco was sure the Gryffindor's ears would be burning. "Do you know how pathetic you look attached to him like a lost puppy, following him about with that stupid look on your face?" Blaise was pacing the space before Draco, Crabbe and Goyle were standing a few feet away from him and watching his every move as if waiting for a signal. "Seriously Draco, I didn't think you'd ever stoop to such lows as whoring yourself out to that that son of a mudblood. You really must be desperate for a fuck. Or is it the other way around? Do you do to Potter what we do to you?" Draco's eyes narrowed now, his arms unfolding as he clenched his fists at his sides.

"Don't you dare talk about Harry like that." He snarled through clenched teeth. Blaise's smirk broadened, but he still paced up and down the room angrily.

"Harry now is it? You sicken me, you filthy excuse for a Slytherin." Before Draco even saw him move Blaise had his wand in his hand and was directing it at Draco. "Crucio!" He cried and Draco felt every nerve ending in his body tear wide open as a blood curdling scream ripped from his throat. He writhed on the floor, twitching and jerking and willing the pain to stop, vaguely aware that Blaise was now standing above him somewhere.

Then the pain abruptly stopped and Draco lay panting on the cold stone floor, trembling and covered in sweat. "Harry fucking Potter, Draco!" Blaise screamed as his boot collided with Draco's stomach winding him and causing him to double over again in pain. "How could you do that to me? You're mine! I will not have you run off with Harry," Kick, "Fucking," Kick, "Potter!" He kicked Draco so hard this time his body rolled painfully across the floor. Draco was coughing violently as blood ran down his chin and spattered the stone, his hands trembled as they grabbed at his stomach and sides.

Before he had time to even stop coughing Blaise had lifted his wand again, his hand shaking with anger, and screamed the word _crucio_. Again Draco's scream echoed loudly around the room with such force it threatened to shatter the glass window panes, his body flailing about on the floor as Blaise stared down at him unblinking, his eyes burning with rage. It felt like hours before the curse was lifted and Draco could do nothing but tremble and cough and sob into the stone, unable to move his body as it continued to cry out in pain even after the curse had stopped. Draco was vaguely aware of the sound of Blaise's retreating footsteps before the sound of two sets of heavier, lumbering footsteps approached him. A thick hand, Crabbe or Goyle's he wasn't sure, grabbed him by the hair and wrenched his head backwards at a painful angle causing him to cry out in pain once again. He felt a leather clad boot kick him in the side of the face making him bite his tongue, his mouth filling with blood. Another hand grasped him by the shoulder and he was lifted painfully to his feet and thrust against the wall face first.

"You'd do well remembering who owns you Draco." Blaise's voice came from just behind Draco, still filled with anger and disgust. "Because I can be very, _very_ nasty when I want to be. _Incarcerous!_" Ropes immediately bound Draco's wrists above his head and the hands that held him down were removed. Draco began to fight the ropes fruitlessly, knowing the whole while that whatever was going to happen today would be far worse than anything he'd ever suffered at Blaise's hands before.

"Do your worst Blaise." Draco's voice sounded stronger than he felt, and he turned his head so he could just see Blaise from the corner of his eye and smirked. "Because I'm not the pathetic one here, you are." He could see Blaise's face twist with rage, caught a glimpse of his hand rising, wand extended, and closed his eyes in anticipation. The pain of a knife being dragged down his back broke through him and he bit his lip to stop from crying out. Again and again he felt the skin on his back being ripped open, the taste of copper hot on his tongue as he bit his lip, willing himself not to make a sound. He heard Blaise scream in anger from behind him and a different sort of agony ripped through him, like hot metal poles were being driven into his sides. His eyes widened and he could do nothing but scream, tears rolling down his cheeks.

"I will not have you make a fool of me Draco!" And although Draco knew Blaise was right behind him his voice was distant as he began to lose consciousness. He was hazily aware of his clothes being stripped from him forcefully as his body went limp. "Oh no you don't Draco, I'm not finished with you yet, not by a long shot. _Rennervate._" Draco's eyes shot open as the spell refused to let him pass out and the full force of pain enveloped him once more. Blaise pulled Draco as close to him as the ropes would allow, forcing him to lean painfully against the wall with his arms and face, before forcing himself inside causing the blond to cry out. Each thrust was deeper and harder than the last, pain shooting up Draco's body with each shuddering movement. Blaise's finger nails dug deep into Draco's wounded sides, pulling and ripping at the gashes that littered his skin. His arms wound round Draco so that his hand s rested on his chest and with one, hard thrust, he wrenched his nails across his skin carving deep cuts across his chest and stomach as he exploded with shivering ecstasy inside him.

He slowly withdrew, scrapping his nails along Draco's back as he moved away, and pulled his trousers up with a sneer, Draco's pale body shivering and covered in sweat and blood. He then turned to his two lackeys and his lips curled. "Go on Crabbe, Goyle, why not have a go yourselves? You're always on the sidelines; why not show our Draco here what he's been missing out on?" Crabbe's eyebrows furrowed slightly and Goyle stammered.

"It's not really our thing Blaise." Goyle said dumbly and Blaise's sneer turned into an ugly frown.

"It wasn't a request. Besides, where else are you going to get it from? Now do as you're told and fuck our precious Slytherin Prince. I want to hear him scream, I want to see him bleed." Blaise flicked his wand and the ropes that bound Draco to the wall dragged him to a table and bent him over it, binding him to the wooden surface awkwardly. Crabbe and Goyle glanced at each other before blindly following orders as always, Crabbe being the first to lower his trousers and grab Draco from behind, forcing himself inside the blond. Draco cried out once more, Crabbe being decidedly wider but shorter than Blaise, and he griped his hands into tight fists as the other boy thrust rhythmically into him. Blaise's smirk widened as he saw the look of feral pleasure on Crabbe's face, and even though he was finished quickly Blaise continued to smile cruelly as Goyle soon took his place.

Once the three Slytherin's had each taken Draco at least twice each, Blaise laughing cynically as he took the boy a third, the ropes that bound him to the table slackened and Draco slumped to the floor. His body was covered in blood, sweat and semen and he trembled from head to toe, tears streaking his face as every muscle and nerve cried out in pain. Blaise crouched down next to Draco's head causing the blond to flinch back slightly; a smile played at Blaise's lips. "I'm warning you now Draco," His voice was softer than before, satisfied, though still malicious and cruel. "If you don't stop hanging around with Potter I'm going to do to him ten times worse than what I've just done to you." Draco's eyes widened and he managed to turn his head and face Blaise.

"What?" His voice was barely above a whisper and Blaise missed the rage that boiled just below the surface of it.

"I said that you're precious Potter will get what's coming to him if-" But before Blaise could finish his sentence, Draco had mustered all the strength he had left and combined it with the rage he felt at Harry being threatened, and lifted a fist with all his might to crash into Blaise's face. The dark skinned boy fell backwards onto the floor clutching at his bleeding nose, and before Crabbe and Goyle could even think about reacting Draco was on top of him punching every piece of him he could reach with a new found strength.

"Don't you _ever_ threaten Harry, you worthless piece of shit!" He screamed, his fists connecting with Blaise's face, sides, chest, arms, whatever he could reach, before Crabbe and Goyle grabbed him by the arms and hair and dragged him off Blaise.

"You _bastard_!" Blaise's voice was muffled through his hand and broken nose as he glared daggers at Draco's squirming body, the blond fighting tooth and nail to get back at the Slytherin that now stood over him. "I want him to pay!" His eyes flashed with fire as he turned to Crabbe and Goyle. "We're not leaving here until he's inches from death, do you hear me?!" Blaise's words ripped through the air and two heads nodded at him before a tirade of punches, kicks, hexes and curses thundered down on the blond Slytherin, though Blaise never got close enough for Draco to touch him.

Their attack on Draco went on for what could have been hours, and by the time they left the room the sun was low in the sky; Blaise making sure the door was locked behind them, the silencing charm still in place. Draco swam in and out of consciousness, his body trembling, bruised and bleeding so much he was almost unrecognizable had it not been for his platinum blond hair that was streaked with blood. His mind, when coherent enough, thought only of Harry, and how distraught he would be when he found out what had happened, and he wished more than anything to never be found so that Harry wouldn't have to go through such pain.


	6. It's Too Late For Me

**Warning:** Aftermath of abuse but mostly a chapter about healing with no actual violence or rape in it, for once!

_**Chapter 6 – It's Too Late For Me**_

Harry's eyes fluttered open and the room before him materialised blurrily. He'd fallen asleep on the large bed in the room of requirement whilst waiting for Draco to meet him. They were supposed to meet up an hour after lunch and Harry had been there long before the arranged time, not wanting to miss out on any time he could spend alone with the blond, but the warmth of the fire and the comfortable mattress had lulled him into a peaceful sleep.

Reaching over to the small table beside the bed, he pulled on his glasses and checked his watch. It was nearly time for dinner and Harry's eyebrows furrowed. Surely Draco would have woken him up when he entered the room and saw him asleep, that or he'd have crawled into bed right beside him and fallen asleep as well. He wouldn't have left him and gone down to dinner without him either, it was all very strange and pointed to Draco having never turned up, which didn't bode well.

Pulling himself grudgingly from the soft bed and slipping his shoes back on, Harry made his way out of the room and down to the Great Hall. He'd have his dinner and see if Draco was there, hoping that he was and that he just got waylaid to their meeting. But when he walked through the large doors and into the hall a quick glance up the Slytherin table told Harry that the blond wasn't there, not yet at least. He took a seat at the Gryffindor table and put some food on his plate, picking at it and poking it around as his gaze kept wandering to the door, hoping that Draco would stride in at any moment.

But as the minutes passed a wave of panic began to wash over him. His eyes wandered to the Slytherin table once more and settled on a small group of students. Blaise, Crabbe and Goyle were eating their dinner in silence, their expressions unreadable, and Harry didn't know whether this eased his mind or made him worry more. It looked like Blaise was in pain, the hint of a bruise on his face, though Harry couldn't really tell from where he was sitting. After a few more minutes Harry abandoned his plate and rose from the table, making his way quickly out of the Great hall and towards the Gryffindor tower. The closer he got to his common room, the faster he went, until he was running up the stairs that lead to the portrait hole.

"Tinsel!" He shouted at the fat lady as he cleared the last few steps and she peered down at him, scrutinising his flustered and hurried appearance before swinging obligingly forwards to allow him entrance. Harry quickly ran up the stairs to his room and flung the door open, heading straight for his bedside cabinet and removing a blank piece of old parchment from a draw. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." He panted as he tapped the parchment with his wand; ink instantly flooding the page and forming corridors and passageways. Harry's eyes hurriedly scanned the paper, his gaze stopping momentarily on each small dot to read the name below it until he finally spotted Draco Malfoy in a classroom on the fifth floor.

Not stopping for breath Harry ran from the room again, jumping the last five steps into the common room and nearly falling as he landed, before rushing back into the corridor and down the stairs in front of him. "Be careful," The fat lady called after him as he continued on his way. "You're going to get someone hurt!"

_I might have already._ He thought as he rushed through corridors and down more stairs until he reached the fifth floor. He quickly checked the Marauder's Map for which classroom Draco was in before hurrying down a corridor to his left. When he reached the classroom at last, he paused momentarily to catch his breath before knocking on the door.

"Draco?" He gasped between ragged breaths, one hand on his side as he kneaded the stitch that had developed there. When no answer came he knocked louder and pressed his face close to the door. "Draco?" His tone was more worried and when again no reply came he tried to turn the door handle, but the door was locked. He checked his map again, making sure he was at the right room, before pointing his wand at the lock. "Alohomora." He chanted and the door gave a soft click as the lock opened.

He turned the handle and opened the door, holding his breath as he peered into the now dark classroom. He squinted through the darkness and took a step forward, holding his wand above his head. "Lumos." He whispered and the room filled with light. As his gaze fell to a corner at the far side of the room he gasped, his throat constricting painfully, and he felt is whole body tremble at the sight before him.

Draco was lying completely naked in a pool of blood. There were gashes and bruises covering his entire body, his once blond hair was mated and thick with dried blood. Harry brought a shaking hand to his mouth and forced his feet to move closer to the body, fear and anger ripping through him. _How could I let this happen? Please God, don't let him be dead._ As he neared Draco's body he saw the slow rise and fall of his chest and heard the sound of rasping breaths. Choking slightly with relief Harry quickly threw himself to the floor at Draco's side.

"Draco? Draco, can you hear me? Oh God, Draco please." He brushed the blood soaked hair back from Draco's forehead but the blond didn't respond. Quickly searching his body with his eyes Harry lifted his wand with a shaking hand and with a flick of his wrist vanished the blood that crusted his skin. The sight before him was even worse with the deep cuts and bruises becoming clearer now that blood wasn't congealed over them. Blood began to ooze from the wounds again and Harry began muttering minor healing spells trying to stop the bleeding, cursing himself for not learning any more powerful healing spells.

Slowly the cuts stopped bleeding and closed slightly, though the sides never quite met, and Draco's breathing became less laboured. Harry brought his hand back up to Draco's head and lifted it gently, pulling it onto his lap. The blond's eyes moved sporadically behind his eyelids before fluttering open. His grey eyes were dim and unfocused as he searched slowly for Harry's face. "Harry." His voice was croaky and barely audible as Harry ran his fingers across his cheek.

"It's ok Draco, it's alright, everything's going to be alright." A small, pained smile tugged at the edge of Draco's lips before his eyelids quivered closed again. Harry pointed his wand at Draco and mumbled a quick 'mobilicorpus', lifting his fragile body from the ground. He quickly grabbed the boys slightly blood stained robes from the floor and wrapped him in them, more to stop him from being cold than covering him up, before quickly heading out of the room with Draco levitated before him.

He made his way swiftly along corridors with Draco by his side, his free hand gently grasping Draco by the shoulder, until he finally came to the hospital wing, bursting through the double doors. Madam Pomfrey was in her office and looked up, startled, through the glass window and at the two boys before hurrying from the room, her eyes wide.

"What on earth?" She ran over to the pair as Harry gently levitated Draco's body onto a nearby bed. "What happened?" She pulled the robes back slightly from Draco's body, her eyes bulging as she did so, before removing her wand from her pocket and muttering incantations at the blond.

"I-" Harry was at a loss for what to say. He had a pretty good idea who had done this to Draco and what had gone on, but he had no proof, and Draco had already made it perfectly clear that Harry was to tell no one about what went on. "I don't know exactly." He finally blurted out, tears stinging at his eyes as he gripped the bed sheets on which Draco lay. "I was walking through a corridor and heard this odd noise coming from one of the classrooms and when I opened the door Draco was lying there in-" The words caught in his throat and he struggled to hold back the sobs, tears now falling down his cheeks. "There was blood everywhere, I tried to heal him as best as I could, but I don't know... I couldn't..." Harry words eventually trailed off as he leant against the bed beside Draco's, his head in his hands as he cried softly into his fingers. Madam Pomfrey continued waving her wand around Draco, the lesions covering his back slowly knitting themselves closed, the curse marks on his chest and arms slowly fading, and Draco's breathing growing steadily smoother; but the wounds left thick scars across his body, adding to his already deeply scarred skin.

"Ok Mr. Potter, go into my office and take the green and orange bottles off the top shelf, then the two blue ones from the second from bottom shelf." Harry nodded and ran to her office, retrieving the potions and returning to Draco's bedside. He stood for a moment, the bottles in his hands, as Madam Pomfrey finished her array of healing spells, before taking one of the bottles from his hand and lifting it to Draco's mouth. She gently parted his lips and the liquid slid down his throat easily, his eyelids flickering slightly as the potion settled in his stomach. She set the bottle on the table next to the bed and took the next bottle, repeating the action until Harry stood empty handed by Draco's side, his fists clenched around the bed sheets once more.

"I need you to fetch Professor Snape, he's the boy's head of house, and he needs to be informed of this immediately." Harry nodded once again and turned to leave. "And Mr. Potter," He turned to face the nurse, tears still heavy in his eye lashes. "If you know anything at all I suggest you tell either me or Professor Snape now so that the people that did this can be dealt with, this is no simple act of bullying." Harry's fists clenched at his side, but once again all he could do was nod, not trusting himself to open his mouth and respond, before taking one last glance at Draco's fragile form and leaving the hospital wing.

As he walked through the hallways and corridors he could feel the anger boiling up inside him. He was angry at Blaise for hurting him again, he was angry at Draco for not letting him tell anyone, and most of all he was angry at himself for letting it happen again. His knuckles were white as his fingernails bit into the flesh on his palms causing them to bleed, and he turned abruptly to punch the stone wall beside him, an angry scream erupting from his mouth.

"Now, now Mr. Potter," Came Snape's familiar drawl from down the corridor. "No need to get so angry, I'm sure the wall didn't mean it, and if you talk things through you might even grow to become friends." Harry turned to face the greasy haired professor, his face shining with tears and an angry, hurt look in his eyes. Snape's expression flickered to something almost resembling concern before returning to its non-committal sneer.

"You need to come to the hospital wing." Harry stated and one of Snape's eyebrows rose slightly.

"You'll show a little more respect when talking to your Professors Mr. Potter, ten points from Gryffindor." Harry's fists tightened slightly, but this was no time to start a fight with Snape.

"Please would you come to the hospital wing, sir? You're needed." Snape made a disapproving noise as he looked down his hooked nose at Harry before setting off down the hall.

"What have you done now then Mr. Potter?" Snape's voice was bored as Harry hurried along to the hospital wing beside him, his hands still clenched into fists.

"I haven't done anything to anyone, _sir._" He managed between clenched teeth, remembering the 'sir' as an afterthought. "Its Draco," Snape's eyebrow lifted again at Harry's casual use of the blond's first name, but Harry didn't see it, his eyes fixed on the floor ahead. "He's been attacked, Madam Pomfrey's caring for him now and said I should come and get you." Snape's footsteps wavered for a second at the mention of Draco's attack, before he quickened his pace.

"And who did the attacking then, Mr. Potter?" His voice was accusatory, but Harry expected nothing less.

"It wasn't me; you can ask him yourself when he wakes up. I found him on the floor of one of the classrooms." His voice broke slightly and he swallowed hard as the images of Draco's body lying in his own blood flooded his vision, blinking back the tears that clung to his eyelashes.

"How badly has he been injured exactly?" Snape's voice was concerned which only made Harry feel worse as they rounded a corner and drew closer to the hospital wing.

"Bad," He managed as tears slid down his face, his breathing becoming erratic. "For a minute I thought he-" He choked on the words, unable to let them pass his lips. Snape brought a hand to his shoulder and squeezed gently before letting it fall back to his side.

They continued to the hospital wing in silence, and Snape only spoke once the doors were open and he and Harry had joined Madam Pomfrey at Draco's side. He took in the scarred form of Draco's body, the bruises and swelling having subsided with the cocktail of potions that had been poured down his neck.

"How is he?" He tore his gaze away to look at Madam Pomfrey who had two fingers pressed against Draco's wrist and was looking intently at her watch. After a moment she sighed and looked up at Snape.

"He'll be fine, though he needs a lot of rest and round the clock care. Some of the marks on his body were caused by very serious curses, and he shows signs of possibly having the Cruciatus curse used on him." Snape's gaze fell back on Draco's body as he slept, Madam Pomfrey shaking her head sadly. "Whoever did this needs to be dealt with, this is not something we can wave away as 'boys being boys'." Snape nodded slowly and turned his gaze to Harry. The Gryffindor was propped against the bed next to Draco's, his hands gripping the mattress so hard it turned his knuckles white, the knuckles on his right hand bleeding slightly from where he'd punched the wall, and his gaze was fixed on Draco's face, seemingly unaware that the conversation had paused and there were two sets of eyes on him.

"Potter," Snape's voice was calm and could almost have been called soothing, had it not been Snape who spoke. Harry finally dragged his eyes from Draco to the Professor, tears still marking his cheeks. "You say you don't know who did this?" Harry shook his head and dropped his gaze back to Draco's face.

"I was on my way back from dinner when I heard a noise coming from a classroom, so I walked in and saw-" He closed his eyes, willing himself not to cry. "I saw Draco lying on the floor. There was blood everywhere. So I cleaned him up and healed him as best as I could before bringing him here." His voice wavered at the end of the sentence and he closed his mouth, unable to say anymore without breaking down completely. Snape eyed him wearily before turning back round to Madam Pomfrey.

"Very well, I'll start some investigating as soon as I've spoken to the Headmaster. For the time being I'll leave Draco in your capable hands." Madam Pomfrey nodded and collected up the empty potions bottles before returning to her study to get more. Snape turned to Harry to see his shoulder's shaking slightly with silent sobs. "I trust you'll make yourself useful to Madam Pomfrey and help her care for Draco?" Harry nodded sharply, not raising his head high enough for Snape to see his face. The Professor nodded slowly before walking towards him and placing his hand on his shoulder again, letting it linger longer than the last time, before he stalked from the room, the doors closing behind him with a soft thud.

Harry finally lifted his head to look back at Draco and walked to the blond's side, taking his limp hand in his own. His palm was warm, which was encouraging as he'd felt so cold when he'd been propped against his lap on the classroom floor. He lifted his free hand to the Draco's forehead, brushing some stray strands of hair away from his face, before running his hand down his cheek.

"I'm sorry I was too late to stop them Draco." He whispered, his tears falling down his cheeks and onto the blanket that covered the scarred blond. "Please... just please be alright. I don't know what I'd do with myself if..." He stroked Draco's cheek again; his finger's barely touching his soft, pale skin. "Please just get better."

~*~*~*~

For two days Harry refused to leave Draco's side, helping Madam Pomfrey administer an assortment of potions throughout the day. The blond slept day and night, Madam Pomfrey giving him sleeping potions saying he needed all the rest he could get. Professor's Dumbledore, McGonagall and Snape all interrogated Harry in their own manner over what happened, Snape being uncharacteristically nice, though still stubborn and suspicious of Harry about the whole thing. Harry over heard them talking in the corridor at one point; Snape was saying that Harry was a little too upset at finding Draco considering they'd been known to hate each other for so long and found it all a bit suspicious, McGonagall thought that Harry knew more than he was letting on but was either too scared to say anything or was protecting someone, whilst Dumbledore merely said that Harry shouldn't be questioned further until they'd had a chance to talk to Draco and get some answers from him.

It wasn't until the second night when Harry, with large bags under his eyes having not slept for those two nights, was ordered by his head of house to go back to his dormitory to get some sleep.

"You're falling asleep on your feet Potter," McGonagall's shrill voice echoed around the hospital wing, "You're no good to Malfoy or Madam Pomfrey at the moment so I won't hear another word from you." Harry shut his mouth, swallowing the retort he had at the fierce look in his Professor's eyes. Slowly he nodded. "Right, off to bed with you then, and I don't expect you back here until after breakfast tomorrow." Harry made to speak again but McGonagall just raised her hand for silence. "I know you've been missing meals as well as sleep Potter." She sighed quietly before softening her tone. "I know you're worried about Malfoy, but you need sleep and nourishment as much as he does. I've allowed you to stay here for two days straight, and you know how Madam Pomfrey feels about visitors out of hours. So get some rest and some food down you and you may return tomorrow morning." Harry sighed, his shoulders dropping slightly in defeat.

"Yes Professor." He mumbled, McGonagall giving him a curt nod before turning and leaving the room. He turned back to Draco who slept peacefully in the bed beside him. His wounds had healed, his bruises faded, and the tremors he'd experienced for a short while from being subjected to the Cruciatus curse had stopped. Harry took his pale hand in his own and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"I'll be back in the morning Draco," He said soothingly as he smoothed back the hair from the Slytherin's forehead. "I wouldn't leave but you heard McGonagall. Just concentrate on getting better ok?" The blonds' eyes stayed closed and he made no indication that he heard Harry as he was deep asleep, but this didn't stop Harry from talking to him. He bent down and pressed a soft kiss to the top of Draco's head. "I'll see you soon." He held his hand for a short while longer before releasing it and slowly leaving the room, taking one quick look back before heading to the Gryffindor tower.

~*~*~*~

Draco drifted through the dark, his mind blank, his body unfeeling, just drifting. He wasn't sure how long he'd been floating in the nothingness but it was soothing and felt safe. But all too soon did the calming darkness begin to fade away, the feeling in his body slowly returning and his mind beginning to function again. His entire body ached and tingled, his mind beginning to reel with thoughts and memories. He wasn't quite sure what had happened to him but he remembered that whatever it was hadn't been pleasant.

"I want it known that I don't think this is a good idea. I understand your desire to take Draco home with you Mr. Malfoy, but waking him up is not recommended." The voice was distant but familiar, a female voice, stern and clearly aggravated, though his mind was too foggy to sort the words into context. "His body has been through a great deal of pain and stress, it might be too much for him to handle if you wake him before he's fully healed."

"Your concern is noted, but he is my son and he's clearly not safe here." This voice was male and it was cold and calculated, almost concerned although Draco knew somewhere at the back of his mind that that concern was only an act. "Once he's awake I'm taking him home with me where he shall remain for the duration of the holidays, if he returns here at all that is." Draco's eyebrow twitched, his mind clearing with every passing second. His father was here, and he was going to be taking Draco home with him, possibly never to return to Hogwart's; the very idea was terrifying. Draco's last memories flashed in his mind and he drew a shuddering breath, his body convulsing slightly as he remembered the pain.

"I think he's waking up." A third voice, Snape's by the sound of it, came from his side and he felt someone leaning on the mattress beside him. "Draco, can you hear me?" Draco screwed his eyes up before slowly opening them. His vision was blurry at first, slowly coming into focus as he blinked frantically. The room was fairly dark; a few torches were lit around his bed and the moon shone in through the distant window. As his eyes scanned the room he could see Snape close to him, concern etched into his features. Madam Pomfrey was the other side of the bed still looking annoyed at having to prematurely wake her patient, but concerned as well. And then, standing at the foot of his bed, Draco saw his father. He swallowed thickly at the cold glare his father was shooting him, his face stern and angry, though he quickly composed his features into something akin to worry before the other two people in the room noticed the interaction.

"How are you feeling dear?" Madam Pomfrey asked taking a potion from a table beside his bed and uncorking it.

"Alright." Draco croaked, quickly clearing his throat knowing that his father wouldn't approve of him sounding weak. Madam Pomfrey lifted the potion to his lips and he swallowed it gratefully, the warm, soothing liquid reaching the tips of his fingers and toes and filling him with a feeling close to that given by Butterbeer. "What happened?" He lifted himself up higher on his pillows so he was sitting more than laying, another weakness as far as his father thought.

"We were hoping you could tell us that Draco." Snape said looking at him questioningly. "You were brought to Madam Pomfrey very close to death a couple of days ago, it was clear you'd been very severely attacked. Mr. Potter was the one that found you, he says he doesn't know who did it but I'm not sure he was telling the truth. Would you care to shed some light on the problem?" Snape stared deep into his eyes and Draco looked away, not wanting Legilimens to be used on him as Snape might very well try. He glanced quickly at his father, his face impassive, though Draco knew what he was thinking. His father knew what had happened, whether he'd spoken to Blaise himself already or just guessed, it was obvious; he could also tell that his father was angry and disappointed, as always. He'd ended up in the hospital wing which meant people asking questions, and none other than Harry Potter had taken him there which he was sure would make his father livid.

"I'm afraid I don't remember much." He said eventually, his gaze dropping from his father to his feet then back to Snape; his father always said keep your head held high, dropping your gaze was yet another sign of weakness. "I was walking through the corridors when I got accosted by someone from behind, everything after that is a blur, I didn't see any faces." He kept his eyes locked with Snape's, determined for him not to discover the lie. Eventually Snape turned to his father, Draco's gaze following suite; his father was still staring at him with an unreadable expression. He quickly turned his gaze to Snape and took a deep breath, his hands folded on top of one another on his black cane.

"How unfortunate that the attackers were smart enough to keep themselves hidden, I take it you will do your best to find out more none-the-less?" His voice was determined, concerned and slightly accusatory; everything that the public would expect Lucius Malfoy to be under such circumstances, but Draco knew better; he was angry, annoyed and wanted nothing more than to be alone with his son so that he could punish him for being so reckless as to get taken to the hospital wing. Draco used all the strength he could muster to stop himself from shaking with fear.

"You have my word that I will give this incident my full attention Lucius." Snape replied. Lucius gave him a curt nod and turned back to face his son.

"Now if you don't mind, I'd like to return home with my son, my wife is very upset by the whole incident and wishes to care for him herself." Draco doubted it very much and wanted nothing more than to stay in his bed and see Harry.

"If you're feeling up to travelling then there's a car waiting outside the school gates to take you home Draco." Snape said softly, his usual mask of nonchalance always vanished when it concerned his Godson. "Lucius and I need to see the Headmaster to clear a few things up and then you can leave. I'll have your trunk sent to the car ahead of you." Draco nodded slowly, glancing briefly at his father again before an idea struck him.

"Actually, I need to pack my trunk, it's almost empty and if someone else packs it something might get left behind." Snape considered him for a moment before nodding once.

"Do you need assistance getting to your dormitory or out of the grounds?" Draco quickly shook his head at his Professor as he saw his father's expression harden out the corner of his eye.

"I'm not a child Professor; I can manage on my own." He drew the blanket back from over him and swung his legs over the side of the bed. His body tingled, the potion he'd consumed having numbed the pain, though as his bare feet touched the cold floor his legs protested at being used and, had his father not been there he might have allowed them to shake and collapse as they so desperately wanted to. He managed to compose himself however, leaning against the bed for support, but in such a way that it wasn't obvious, and gave Snape an 'I told you so' look, despite his desire to lay back down and fall asleep.

"Very well," Snape gave him an approving look before turning to his father. "After you Lucius; Dumbledore wants to talk to us both before Draco leaves, he's very concerned about what's happened." Lucius glanced at his son quickly, disgust just apparent behind his eyes, though Draco was the only one to see it, before heading towards the doors of the room, his cane clicking against the tiled floor, Snape following close behind.

Draco took a steadying breath, dreading what was going to happen when he was finally alone with his father, but feeling Madam Pomfrey's eyes burning against the back of his head he gently pushed himself upright from the bed and collected his shoes and socks from the chair beside him.

"I'll inform your parents as to what potions you need to take and when." Madam Pomfrey was saying as she began to strip his bed of its sheets, ready to change them to a fresh lot. "Your body still has a lot of healing to do and without the proper medication you won't heal properly and could find yourself in a lot of pain." Draco almost smiled; he knew full well his father had no intention of treating him.

He finished putting his socks and shoes on, pulled his robes over his head and picked his wand up from the table, putting it in his pocket. He quickly turned from Madam Pomfrey and made his way out of the hospital wing before she had a chance to say anymore to him, as he knew she probably wanted to. When he left the room, the doors slamming behind him, he made his way along the dimly lit corridors with one destination in mind; Gryffindor Tower.

Eventually he arrived on the seventh floor, panting slightly at the exertion on his healing body. He stopped before the portrait of the fat lady and took a deep breath. "Tinsel." He stated firmly, hoping the password had not changed. The fat lady stirred and raised an eyelid slightly before waving a hand in his direction and swinging forwards, wriggling to make herself more comfortable in her chair. Draco climbed in through the hole and made his way to Harry's dorm, cursing the numerous stairs he still had to climb, his legs protesting more painfully with every step. Eventually he reached a familiar door and only paused briefly before pushing it open and walking in.

The room was dark, strips of moonlight silhouetting the five beds that curved around the room. All the curtains were pulled back save those on a bed in the middle of the room. Draco shut the door behind him a little heavier than was necessary and the sound of movement emanated from behind the closed curtains. A figure emerged from the bed and reached to the table beside them, pulling the glasses that rested there onto their face and standing. Draco took a step forwards to that he was bathed in moonlight and folded his arms across his chest.

"Draco?" Harry's voice was croaky, like he'd either not slept in days or been crying recently; or both. Draco took in a quiet breath and forced a sly smirk to cross his face.

"Potter." He smirked, his voice cold. "I came to let you know that it's over, whatever this _thing_ we have going on is. It was fun whilst it lasted, don't get me wrong, but it's clear that you're getting too attached to me, understandably, and frankly it's getting annoying." His words infuriated him and he wanted nothing more to embrace the boy who'd saved his life and tell him he didn't mean it, but the charade must go on. He realised that doing this was the only way to keep Harry safe. Blaise had threatened him already and he had no doubt that his father would be beyond furious if he found out what was going on between him and the Gryffindor, and now he was going to be gone for the last week of the Christmas holidays there was no way for him to protect Harry.

"What are you talking about?" Harry's voice was barely audible and Draco was glad that he couldn't see the pained look that had undoubtedly crossed his face in the darkness.

"Come now Potter, you're not that naive are you? I was having some fun, and now I'm bored. I'm leaving for the rest of the holidays and figured I might as well tell you it's over now before embarrassing myself by breaking up with you in front of the whole school." He could see Harry slowly shaking his head in the dark, his glasses reflecting what little light was in the room.

"You're not serious, I know you're not. What do you mean leaving?" Draco's smirk wavered slightly; he needed to leave before Harry did or said something to make him dismantle the lie before even getting it started. "Where are you going?" Draco paused slightly before replying.

"Home." Again Harry shook his head and took a step towards the blond.

"To your father? You can't! You're not safe there." Draco took a step towards the door as the Gryffindor advanced on him, his smirk still firmly in place though it threatened to fall.

"What, and I'm safe here?" Harry stopped in his tracks taking a sharp breath.

"I'm sorry." Draco's eyebrows furrowed at Harry's apology, both boys bathed in darkness now so neither could see the others expression. "I fell asleep waiting for you, maybe if I hadn't I could have got there sooner, stopped them from-" his voice quivered and Draco could just about see his hands clench into fists at his sides. He wanted to tell him it wasn't his fault, that he'd have been hurt if he'd got involved as well and then they'd both be in the hospital wing, if not dead on the classroom floor, but he couldn't. It was going to hurt, both of them, but it needed to be said.

"Don't bother apologising Potter, it doesn't mean anything. Why do you think it happened in the first place? Seeing you is more damaging to my health than I first suspected, so for my own safety, among other reasons, I don't want to see you anymore unless it's in lessons or on the receiving end of one of my hexes." He'd dropped the smirk, his face pained and tears brimming in his eyes as the words left his mouth; he knew Harry couldn't see his face and so put as much malice into that horrid lie as possible.

"You're lying." It was more of a plea than anything else, his voice strained as he wished it not to be true. "You've been told to say this by Blaise or your father, it's not true." His voice was a whisper as he took a shaky step forwards, moonlight washing over him to reveal his tear stained face, his heart breaking behind his eyes. Draco bit his lip to stop from sobbing out loud and closed his eyes against the heart wrenching sight.

"Afraid it is Potter," his voice was steady and harsh, years of practice coming in to play as tears spilled down his cheeks. "Now if you'll excuse me I must go pack my things. Do try to get over me, God knows I don't need you following me around when I get back to school." He turned and quickly and pulled the door open, almost running from the room in a desperate bit to get away from the pain he was causing.

"Draco, please." He heard Harry's voice from behind him but continued down the stairs taking them two at a time, tears cascading down his cheeks and onto his robes. He hurried across the common room and into the corridor beyond, running down the stairs before him. His legs were heavy, his shoulders shaking with every sob. He could barely see through his tears as he continued towards the Slytherin dungeons, every step he took taking all of his energy. He'd never hated himself as much as he did right now, images of Harry breaking replaying over and over before his blurry eyes; but he knew it was for the other boys own safety, he was better off like this, as far away from Draco as possible. It was going to hurt for a long time, but it was all he could do to protect the boy he loved.

~*~*~*~

**A/N:** Putting this at the end so you could all get on with reading the chapter first. I couldn't believe it when I realised I hadn't updated this since February *bows deeply* please forgive me! There's so much going on at the moment that I just don't have the time of day to write anymore which is a pain in the arse coz I love writing so much. Unfortunately I can probably say its going to take just as long, if not longer to update with the next chapter. I have started writing it already, but I'm in the process of moving house and my babies due in less than 8 weeks! (shits her pants) so it may be a while, but hopefully I can give you something. I will say this now, I am not abandoning this fic! I have the entire plot written out so I know what's going to happen (even if I do change it as I go along, which I often do) so there's no excuse for me not writing it, but again, updates will take me a while, just be patient with me! Thanks for all the reviews though and I hope you enjoyed the chapter!


	7. Alone Again

**A/N: **I know, I know, I'm a horrible person. Longer a/n at the end, for now, read on!

**Warning:** Physical abuse

_**Chapter 7 – Alone Again**_

Draco followed Snape out of the entrance hall and down the steps outside Hogwart's heading to the gates that marked the perimeter of the Wizarding School, his trunk floating before the potions master, every trace of sadness and despair that had filled him earlier having been removed from the blonde's face. His father was already in the car waiting for his arrival, the door open and ready to admit him. Draco swallowed thickly.

"Your father has decided to let you return after the holidays so I'll see you in just over a week Draco." Snape said almost softly as he levitated the trunk into the boot of the car. "Rest as much as you can, eat and drink plenty and take your potions and there's no reason you shouldn't be back to normal by the time you return." He closed the door of the cars boot and walked to Draco placing a caring hand on his shoulder and looking at him with soft concern. "If you remember anything about what happened tell your father immediately, the people that did that to you need to be punished." The end of his sentenced was hissed from between his teeth, rage building at the thought of Draco's aggressors getting away with their crime.

Draco merely nodded and smiled half heartedly. Snape closed his arms around his shoulders in a rare sign of affection and Draco couldn't help but reciprocate the action, his grip much firmer than the older mans, every muscle in his body willing him to hold on and never let go, to pass on the silent suffering and pain that he was enduring at the mere thought of returning to Malfoy Manor for just one week with his father. But too soon did the contact break and Draco was climbing into the car, the interior magically enlarged to accommodate at least twenty people comfortably. The door closed behind him and he looked up to see his father staring at him in deepest loathing.

"Home." He called to the driver and the car immediately sprung into action, a black fabric screen sliding upwards between the driver's compartment and the back of the car to allow them privacy. Draco's gaze never wandered from his father's, but the longer he stared into those cold silver eyes so much like his own, the more afraid and nauseous he felt. The silence seemed to stretch on for hours before his father's lips eventually parted in speech.

"I'm thoroughly disappointed Draco." He drawled, though his voice was tinged with anger and disgust. "It seems you can't even be at school for a few months before disgracing the Malfoy name." Draco swallowed, his gaze finally dropping from his father to the floor.

"I didn't want to go to the hospital wing father I assure you, Potter took me there whilst I was unconscious." His voice wavered slightly and wasn't as strong as he'd have liked, something his father obviously disapproved of as well.

"Sit up straight and use eye contact when talking to someone." Lucius snapped, Draco immediately doing as commanded though wanting nothing more than to sink into the car seat and disappear. "Have you remembered anything that I've taught you over the years Draco?" His voice was harsh still as he inhaled angrily. "It matters not whether you wanted to be there or not, that's where you ended up and now it looks bad on the family." It always came down to _the family_, though they were as far from being a family as three people related by blood could be. "And taken there by Potter no less," the words were spat from his mouth like venom and Draco had to bite his tongue to keep from whimpering in fear. "It's disgraceful and pathetic. You shall never put yourself in such a position again, do you understand?" His father spoke as if he'd had a choice in the matter and not been close to death on a classroom floor, left there by his house mates after a violent attack; still he nodded firmly.

"Yes father, I'm sorry, it won't happen again." Lucius' face twisted in anger at his son's words and Draco was glad to be sat at nearly the opposite end of the car to him.

"Do not apologise, a Malfoy never apologises, I have told you this, insolent boy." Again Draco bit his tongue to stop the fearful whimper escaping his lips. "When we get back home I'll make sure you're sorry in the only way you seem to understand." Draco couldn't stop his eyes from widening and his breathing deepening and becoming erratic, biting his tongue so hard he could taste blood. Lucius sneered slightly and finally took his gaze from his son and turned to look out the car window.

The rest of the journey passed in silence, Lucius' gaze not straying from the passing landscape, that malicious sneer never leaving his face, whilst Draco stared out the opposite window occasionally stealing frightened glances at his father. Eventually the car pulled into Malfoy Manor, the large wrought iron gates twisting and slinking backwards into the hedges to allow the car passage before twisting gracefully back into shape. As the car stopped in front of the stone steps that led to the large double doors that opened to reveal Malfoy Manor, Draco's heat rate increased and his breathing once again became erratic, his eyes flitting from the doors to his father and back again. His father merely opened the car door and climbed out onto the gravel, Draco following him briskly but shaking slightly.

"Your wand, Draco." Lucius turned stiffly to his son, holding out his left hand, his other placed lightly on top of his cane. Draco swallowed and stared at his father for a brief moment.

"Father?" He questioned, before the extended hand was whipped across his face in an echoing slap. He stumbled slightly, bringing his own pale hand to rest on his reddening cheek, his father's hand once again extended.

"Wand, now. You won't be needing it for your brief stay here." Draco shook slightly as he reached a hand inside his robes and pulled out his wand, dropping it grudgingly into his father's palm. Lucius' fingers clasped around the wood tightly, his gaze stern as he stared at his son. "Now get your trunk and take it inside, I don't plan on spending the whole morning standing on the door step."

"Yes father." Draco replied, turning away from the tall blond and heading to the back of the car. He fumbled slightly with the handle before opening the boot and retrieving his trunk with some difficulty owing to its size and weight. After dragging it to the floor he closed the boot and began to haul the large trunk up the steps and to the front doors which opened unaided to allow the two Malfoy's entry. Once inside the large entrance hall he began his ascent up the two flights of stairs to his bedroom with the heavy trunk in tow, his arms trembling and aching and sweat gleaming on his skin by the time he reached the room. He opened the door and dragged the trunk across the floor before he finally allowed himself rest when it was deposited at the end of his bed.

He braced himself against the bed frame and wiped the sweat from his face with his forearm before the sound of his bedroom door being shut with a soft click caused his body to stiffen and freeze to the spot, his eyes widening in fear. Slowly he turned to see his father's angry, sneering face advancing towards him. Automatically he backed away from the man, his legs bumping against the mattress and stopping him from backing up any further. Slowly Draco began to shake his head, his lips parting in words that he couldn't speak as Lucius closed the gap between them and grasped Draco's blond hair in his hand causing a gasp to escape the younger man's lips.

"A constant disappointment; that's what you are to me." He pulled Draco's head back at a sharp angle causing another whimpering cry to escape his lips. "I have tried time and time again to make you into the Malfoy you were born to be, and look at you; you're pathetic." He pulled Draco towards him before quickly throwing him away, the smaller blond falling sprawled onto his bed. As he winced against the pain and turned towards his father he saw his slender hand lift his wand and direct it at his son. "Crucio." He whispered and the room was instantly filled with Draco's screams.

Lucius paced around the bed, his wand still pointed at Draco as the boy writhed and twisted against the curse, the bed sheets wrapping around him and becoming soaked in his sweat and tears. "Why do you think I do this to you Draco?" He finally said as he flicked his wand and the curse was lifted. Draco's body relaxed against his mattress, his breathing erratic and his body trembling. "Why do you think I put you through all this pain?" He continued to pace around the bed, idly twiddling his wand between his fingers. "I don't do it because I enjoy it," Though Draco's eyes were closed he could practically hear the small smile curling his father's lips; they both knew that was a lie. "I do it because you need discipline, because you need teaching." He stopped his pacing and turned to face his son, the boy's chest still rising and falling heavily against the sweat soaked sheets. "I do it because you are weak." Draco could hear the anger rising in his father's voice and it took all the strength he had left not to start trembling again.

"You're pathetic Draco, and had it not been for my intervention you'd be even more pathetic than you already are. Just the sight of you disgusts me." He shook his head, his features twisted as though he'd smelt something revolting, and continued his pacing. "I often ask myself why I was cursed with you as a son. From the moment you were born me and your mother could tell there was something wrong with you. Narcissa just gave up, decided to ignore you and resign you to a lost cause. I've spent years trying to mould you into a Malfoy, trying to make you worthy of carrying such a noble name; and look at the thanks I get." He raised his wand again and instantly Draco was filled with the pain of a thousand knives ripping at his flesh. He opened his mouth to scream but no sound escaped.

"You're nothing! After everything I've given you, everything I've done for you, all the hours I've wasted trying to make you better; you still manage to stain the Malfoy name and bring shame to this family!" Draco felt like every pore on his body was spilling blood as his back arched against the bed in agony, his father's anger strengthening the Cruciatus curse. His vision began to blur at the edges, black dots swimming in front of his eyes, before he was completely enveloped in darkness. Lucius continued the Cruciatus curse for a further minute on Draco, though he knew his son was already unconscious.

When Draco woke next the first thing he felt was a bone deep coldness, his body already shaking uncontrollably, both from the freezing temperatures and the aftermath of his father's Cruciatus curses. He was lying on a cold, stone floor and gathered he'd been there several hours at least as the cold penetrated him so thoroughly. Every muscle in his body ached and spasms of pain twitched through him randomly as his body suffered the after effects of his father's cruelty. He took a deep breath, releasing it slowly, before opening his eyes and blinking into the darkness.

It took a few minutes for his eyes to pierce the dark enough to make out shapes around him, but he already knew where he was. Slowly he lifted himself to a sitting position on the floor, his aching muscles crying out in protest sending more painful spasms through his body. He clenched his eyes against the pain and waited for it to ebb before opening them again and squinting around the room.

There was very little in the room and not much had been done with it compared to the rest of Malfoy Manor. The walls, floor and ceiling were all made of old stone, covered in layers of grime and dust that had crept into the cracks with years of neglect. Though Lucius prided himself in keeping appearances up and made sure his house was immaculate at all times, the cellar was left to decay and fester so that he always had somewhere dank to hide his disappointment of a son.

Draco leant against the wall behind him and drew his knees to his chest, the sound of metal dragging on stone alerting him to the fact that his father had chained him to the wall. He half smiled to himself as he hugged his body trying to warm up, he wasn't sure where his father expected him to run off to when he was locked in the cellar, wandless.

Hours past and Draco periodically rose from the floor and paced the small area the chains would let him in order to stretch his muscles and try and warm himself slightly. He didn't know how long he'd been unconscious for, whether it had been hours or more than a day, either was possible, and so he had no idea of the time or date and how much longer he'd have to spend in this hell hole of a house before returning to Hogwart's; not that that idea was any more comforting as a fate just as bad awaited him there. Slowly he slumped to the floor with a heavy sigh and buried his head in his hands.

**A/N:** I'm so, so sorry for the long wait, I didn't mean to leave it this long, but between finding a new house (which took over a month), moving in and then having a baby I haven't had the time to write. I'm afraid that the updates are going to continue to be slow, having a 3 week old baby is a tiring job, not to mention full time, and there's no such thing as holidays, but I will write more, slowly but surely, I will not give up on this fic, have no fear!


	8. That's My Boy

_**Chapter 8 – That's My Boy**_

Over the next couple of days Lucius visited Draco several times; whether it was just to voice his displeasure at having such a worthless son or to torture him until his screams rang through the Manor. Meals were brought to him by trembling house elves once a day if he was lucky; he had a feeling his father tried his hardest to forget his son was even there, unless he was bullying him.

After what felt like weeks but was more likely only a couple of days, Lucius threw the door to the cellar open with a deafening bang, the wooden door cracking with the force of it. Draco swallowed hard and pressed himself as close to the wall as was possible; it was clear his father was furious at something and Draco was going to be on the receiving end of that fury.

"Crucio!" He shouted as soon as he was far enough down the stone steps to see Draco's cowering form. Draco's head snapped back against the pain and hit the wall with a resounding thud that was drowned out by the sound of his screams. Lucius crossed the room in three enormous strides and stooped over Draco, his wand hand quivering in anger as he glared ferociously at his son. He flicked his wand minutely and the curse was lifted, though his wand stayed trained on the quivering boy before him. Draco took in deep, shuddering breaths but didn't move from his crumpled position on the floor.

Lucius' mouth opened and closed several times as if trying to force words through the blind rage that was still clear on his face and constricting his throat. Eventually he let out a strangled scream and thrust his wand towards Draco, the pain of the Cruciatus curse coursing through his veins for a second time. Eventually the pain subsided to a dull ache and Lucius began pacing the floor before him, his face still twisted in angry contempt.

"I just had a conversation with Mr. Zabini." Lucius spat still pacing the cold stone floor, the heels of his shoes clicking ominously. Draco's eyes widened slightly and his breath caught in his throat. "He told me some very disturbing news." His free hand was clenching and unclenching as he paced, the knuckles on his wand hand were white he was gripping the wood so hard. Suddenly he whirled on his son, wand pointing between his eyes. "Harry Potter, Draco?" His voice was an angry whisper as he stooped over his terrified son. "Legilimens!" Had Draco not been subjected to torture mere moments before he might have had a slightly better chance at stopping the invasion into his mind, his Occlumency skills were very well developed for a wizard his age, but Lucius pushed past Draco's feeble attempt at stopping him and began rifling through his memories of the last few weeks.

Images began sweeping across Draco's vision; he and Harry playing in the snow by the lake; Harry finding him that first night in the bathroom; he and Harry bewitching paper cranes to fly around the Room of Requirement; Harry on top of him on the bed whilst angry voices and sneering faces swam Draco's vision; and finally, Draco waking up with his fingers clasped around Harry's throat, Harry's eyes rolling back in his head.

Draco let out a strangled cry as his father pulled out of his memories, an evil sneer marking his pointed face as he glared at his panting son.

"My, my Draco, I knew you were a fuck up but that really is twisted." He laughed cynically as he bent over his son's shivering body. "Looks to me like you can't even distinguish between pain and pleasure anymore; maybe all these years of teaching you are finally getting through to you." He prodded Draco harshly in the side with his wand causing the young blond to wince and cower away from it. "Strangling Potter in your sleep? Maybe you're more Malfoy than I've been giving you credit for." Another laugh escaped Lucius' lips as he straightened up and Draco whimpered. Lucius licked his lips, his eyes racking over Draco's still trembling body like a predator eying its prey.

Slowly Lucius began to unbutton his robes, that predatorial look never leaving his face. Draco whimpered once more and tried to push himself further towards the wall, his body still aching and stiff after being subjected to the Cruciatus curse. Lucius' eyes narrowed. "Still, you need to learn your station Draco. I won't have you gallivanting around Hogwart's with Potter." He snarled slightly as he said the word Potter and his robes dropped to the floor. He then began to remove his trouser's, Draco's eyes widening fearfully.

"Father," he finally sobbed, trying to lift himself from the ground. "Father please," Lucius' foot collided with Draco's stomach and he choked on the last of his sentence, doubling over and clutching at his middle.

"Don't be so pathetic Draco." He bent down to his son, his face close to Draco's as he sneered at him. "You're finally turning into the son I'd dreamed of; don't spoil it now by begging." He caressed Draco's cheek slowly with one, long finger, his son staring at him wide eyed and pleading. Draco took a steadying breath and, his eyes still locked with his fathers, opened his mouth to speak.

"Father, Harry's just-" as soon as the words left his mouth he knew he'd stepped out of line. Lucius' features contorted in rage and he sprang to his feet.

"_Harry?_" he screamed, his hands balled into fists at his side, knuckles white and face red with fury. "You so much as _think_ Potter's name ever again and I'll kill the both of you!" His foot swung forwards and this time collided with Draco's face, breaking his nose and sending him into darkness.

A loud crack awoke Draco some time later, though how long he wasn't sure. The first thing he noticed was the smell of blood, and the taste of copper in his mouth. Then the pain came. His entire body ached all over, though his nose and arse hurt the most. Flashes of his father entering the cellar raced across his vision and he shuddered at the memory. He heard the sound of something being placed on the stone floor beside him and jumped, his eyes shooting open as he tried to scramble away from the noise, his body protesting at the movement.

His eyes landed on the shaking form of a house elf. Its large ears and bulbous nose were shaking as he stared wide eyed at Draco, wringing his hands and glancing at the cellar door.

"M-Master Malfoy said to bring you some food, sir." The elf squeaked and motioned towards the tray of food on the floor between them. It contained a bowl of hot soup, a couple of slices of bread and a glass of pumpkin juice; it was the best meal Draco had had since he'd been home. Glancing from the food to the elf and back again Draco slowly and painfully began to lift himself from the floor into a sitting position. He reached for the food and began hungrily spooning the hot soup into his mouth. The house elf smiled weakly at him, though it quickly left his face as he glanced once more at the cellar door.

"Master Malfoy said to bring young sir just bread," again he glanced at the door, his hands still wringing together. "But Bleado and the other house elves were worried about young Master, so we brought young Master soup and pumpkin juice as well. The other elves is punishing themselves now sir." Again he smiled weakly at Draco. Draco swallowed his mouthful of bread, his soup having been finished already and, turned to the house elf.

"I forbid you and the other elves to hurt yourself for doing this for me, my father's a monster, we shouldn't all have to suffer because of him." The elf quivered slightly on the spot and bowed low to Draco.

"Thank you, sir." He straightened up again and smiled broadly at Draco. "Master says Bleado is to heal some of your wounds, sir. So that they is not visible when you return to Hogwart's later today, sir." Draco looked up from his glass of pumpkin juice which was halfway towards his mouth.

"I go back today? How long until I leave?" A small smile was creeping its way across Draco's face; he was leaving the Manor and wouldn't have to be back again until the summer. Bleado smiled back at him.

"Young Master will be flooing into Hogsmeade in four hours; Professor Snape is to be meeting you in the Three Broomstick's, sir." Draco's smile broadened and he let out a sigh of relief. He finished his pumpkin juice and set it down on the tray with empty soup bowl. Bleado approached Draco and held his hands up, palms facing the blond. Draco had been healed by the house elves before; many of the injuries that his father had inflicted in the past were such that they needed medical attention, and Lucius was always reluctant to heal his son himself, and taking him to St. Mungo's would have raised questions he'd much rather not be asked; therefore the elves were the ones that took care of Draco, the only ones that ever took care of Draco until recently.

Bleado slowly raised his hands from Draco's feet up to his face, a warmth sweeping over the blonde as his wounds were healed causing him to release a contented sigh. He smiled at the house elf and picked himself up from the floor, stretching his no longer aching limbs. "Thank you Bleado."

"Young Master is most welcome." The elf beamed back and bowed low to the floor. "Young Master's things have been sent ahead to Hogwart's already sir; Master Malfoy has instructed Bleado to release young Master at 3 o'clock and allow you to shower and change before bringing you to Master Malfoy's study; from there you shall travel to Hogsmeade, sir" Again Bleado bowed low and with an apologetic smile disapperated with a crack.

Draco stretched his arms up to the ceiling, arching his back and shaking his legs in an attempt to rid them of their rigidity. In a few short hours he'd be returning to Hogwart's, it was by no means safe, but it was better than being at the Manor with his father. He'd be with Harry at least.

_You so much as _think_ Potter's name ever again and I'll kill the both of you!_ Lucius' words echoed through his head and he stopped pacing the cellar floor. _Harry._ Draco pushed his palms into his eyes so that they swam with black dots. He'd abandoned Harry when he left Hogwart's for fear that Blaise would hurt him, but now it was his father threatening them, and he feared his father much more than Blaise, Crabbe or Goyle.

Sighing, defeated, he knew he'd have to stay away from the Gryffindor, for both their sakes. The animosity and snide remarks would have to return when they passed each other in hallways or shared a class, all the memories of laughter and kisses pushed aside and hidden deep inside him, only to be lingered on when lying in bed at night waiting for seep to come, tears brimming in his eyes at the loss of love.

Taking a deep, steadying breath Draco removed his hands from his face, his palms speckled with tears, and spent the next few hours fighting with himself over doing what was safe and pretending he didn't care about Harry, or doing what he wanted and running straight into the Gryffindor's arms, eyes brimming and an apology on his lips.

Finally 3 o'clock arrived and Bleado apparated into the cellar and removed the chain from Draco's ankle. Draco smiled gratefully at him and they made their way up the stone stairs and into the vast foyer. Draco blinked furiously, his eyes taking a few long moments to adjust to the sudden change in brightness, before ascending more stairs and heading to his bedroom to wash and change.

Once in his room he began stripping the layers of filthy clothes from his body, by the time he opened the door to his en-suite bathroom he was completely naked; dirt and grime caking his smooth, pale skin. He turned the taps to the shower on and hot water streamed from the shower head immediately engulfing the bathroom in steam. He stepped under the water and hissed in both pleasure and pain as the too hot water scalded his skin. Although the water was slowly turning his skin red with the heat, it felt good on his flesh, like it was burning the taint from him.

Losing himself in the heat and the pain, Draco didn't hear the faint footfalls crossing the space between the bathroom door and the shower under which he stood. His eyes closed, face in the stream of hot water, it wasn't until a hand closed roughly around the wet hair at the back of his head and pulled it backwards, eliciting a pained cry from between his lips, that Draco realised his father had followed him into his room. He had enough time to open his eyes and glance at his father's sneering face before he was forced roughly onto his knees in front of the stronger man, his hand still wound tightly through strands of blond hair.

Lucius' free hand reached to his crotch and hastily undone his trouser flies, the fabric falling quickly to the floor to reveal his hard, throbbing cock. Draco barely had time to whimper before his head was forced forward and his father's cock was thrust unceremoniously into his mouth. Lucius immediately set a brutal pace, both his hands on the back of his sons head, driving his throbbing member in and out of Draco's mouth with such force Draco was sure he was going to throw up.

After only a couple of minutes Lucius grunted and gave a last few slow, hard thrusts and came down the back of Draco's throat. Pulling Draco's mouth from his prick and all but throwing him onto the shower floor, he proceeded to pull his trousers back up and stare disgustedly at his son as he choked and sobbed on the wet tiles beneath him.

"I don't want to hear anymore about you and _Potter_," Lucius spat Harry's name between clenched teeth as he smoothed out the front of his clothes. "In fact I don't want to hear about you at all until you return in the summer, do you understand?" Draco continued to splutter and tremble on the floor and, becoming impatient, Lucius grabbed his hair once more and forced his head back at a painful angle causing Draco to cry out. "I said do you understand?" Draco nodded furiously and once again Lucius threw him on to the floor like something disgusting, a sneer on his face. "Good, now hurry up and dress, you mustn't keep Severus waiting." And with that he stalked from the room leaving Draco trembling and sobbing silently under the hot stream of water still issuing from the shower.

**A/N:** Again not massively long, but it's an update at least! Hope you enjoyed it and hopefully I can get the next chapter written as quickly as this one as I now have two other stories quickly forming in my mind and begging for release.


	9. Author Note

**Author Note – **I am a horrible person leaving things the way I have, I know I am, but right now I'm just not in the right frame of mind to be writing Harry Potter fanfiction, I'm so sorry. My heads not in it and every time I try and write it just doesn't come out how I want it to. So I put to you two options. Either you can all be patient and wait for my muse to get back from her extended holiday or I can pass the story on to someone who'd like to finish it. I have the rest of the story all plotted out so I can pass that on and it can be changed, kept the same or scrapped and re-written completely if whoever takes it thinks its rubbish. Message me or leave a comment to let me know what you think and maybe, one day, you'll get to find out what happens. Again, I'm really sorry, but there are just so many things going on I can't write it at the moment. *bows deeply and awaits virtual thrashing*

Peri


	10. Seeing Red

_**Chapter 9 – Seeing Red**_

Draco stepped out of the fireplace at The Three Broomsticks wearing a pair of black trousers, a cashmere jumper and a thick dark green coat lined in black fir. Snape was awaiting him a few feet away and greeted him with a curt nod. Draco returned the gesture with even less feeling than Snape, the potions master frowning slightly at his lack of emotion.

"Professor." Draco greeted, folding his arms across his chest in an attempt to shield himself from the world. Snape sighed inwardly, he knew that defeated look all too well on the blondes face.

"Draco, I'm afraid we've been unable as of yet to find the ones responsible for your attack." Draco turned a confused look at Snape before realising what he was talking about and schooling his features back into nonchalance; it wasn't an attack as far as he was concerned, it was just a way of life. He just nodded in reply and pulled his arms around himself tighter.

Snape's face twitched slightly as he took in the boy's appearance; dark circles were under his eyes, his skin was blotchy and a little clammy and his eyes were dull and lifeless. Yes the blond had put a glamour charm on himself, but Snape was too well schooled to be fooled by it. "Come then, let's get you up to the castle." Draco nodded a fraction and Snape led the way from the bar and into the snow covered street outside.

Snape could tell that Draco was, understandably, shaken by his experience the previous week, he just thought that a week at home would have calmed him more; if anything he looked worse than when he'd left. Snape couldn't put his finger on it but he didn't like it, and knew the young Slytherin wouldn't tell him anything unless he wanted, so didn't press the subject.

They swiftly made their way to the castle, the cold winter winds whipping at their faces and leaving them red and sore. When they finally walked up the stone steps and into the entrance hall it was well past dinner time and the great hall was empty so they passed straight by and headed down the stairs to the dungeon, all the while the silence between them stretching on.

When they reached the Slytherin common room Snape stopped and turned to face Draco, the blondes arms still wrapped tightly around his chest. For a brief second Snape thought he saw fear in the boy's eyes as he looked at the portrait that admitted them to the common room, but the look was gone in the blink of an eye and Draco turned to face him, his face calm and unemotional. Snape took a deep breath; his brain telling him that something was wrong though he couldn't figure out what.

"Well then Draco, I leave you in the hands of your fellow Slytherin's." Draco merely nodded vaguely, his eyes beginning to glaze over slightly. "Try to rest and don't over-exert yourself. Have you eaten? I could have a house elf bring you some food." Draco continued to stare into oblivion for a second before shaking his head and forcing a half smile onto his face.

"No, thank you Professor, I ate before I left. I think I'll just go straight to bed." Snape nodded in reply and spoke the password, the doorway to Slytherin revealing itself, and Draco admitted himself inside.

"Draco," Snape called before the portrait shielded the common room from view. The blond turned to look at him with weary eyes. "Be careful." The doorway closed and both men stood still for a few moments before turning away from each other and walking towards their destinations.

The common room was reasonably empty; being the first night back most people were tired from their journeys and generous amounts of school food and so had headed to their dorms for an early night. Draco took a deep breath and walked across the room without turning his head. As soon as he'd entered the room everything had gone quiet, all the students stopping in their musings to look at him. As he began to walk hurried whispers erupted around the room, heads bent together with scandalised looks in their eyes. Determined to ignore them however, Draco made his way directly to his dorm and closed the door behind him. Mercifully the room was empty of occupants and Draco quickly walked to his bed, threw himself upon it, and dragged the curtains closed around him. He cast a quick impervious charm and sat back on his heels, wand in hand, staring blankly about him.

They knew, everyone knew. How much they knew he wasn't sure, he wasn't even sure if what they knew was even close to the truth, but they knew something and that was enough. He could cope with things before now; nobody knew about it, he still had his reputation with the rest of the school. But now?

And yet he didn't care. Something deep inside him had been broken over the holidays, something vital, and now he found he didn't care about who knew. He didn't care about Snape or Dumbledore or the countless other students who had heard rumours of what went on over the holidays. He didn't care about Blaise or his father. He didn't care about his empty stomach, his healing wounds, or his gaunt appearance. He didn't care about anything anymore.

A smile twitched at his lips as he pulled his clothes off, threw them to the end of the bed, and buried himself beneath his duvet.

For the next few days Draco avoided everyone like they had spattergroit. He only spoke when spoken to and he went straight from his last lessons to his dorm where he finished his homework and promptly went to bed. A few times he'd pass Harry in the corridors or share a class with him, but he acted like he wasn't even there. He'd chance a glance at him and see the hurt in his eyes at Draco's behaviour, but it was better this way; this way Harry was safe.

Harry didn't see it that way though. As the days went on he became more and more depressed, not telling anyone why, just gazing into the distance or staring endlessly at the marauder's map. Ron and Hermione were at a loss for what to do; they'd never seen him like this before. No amount of pestering, persuading or sympathising could get Harry to tell them what was wrong, so they knew it was serious, but still had no evidence of what it was.

Though Hermione had a theory. Everyone had heard rumours about what had happened to Draco over the holidays -illness, injury, potions experiment gone wrong- whether any of them were close to the truth she wasn't sure, but something had happened, and it had been serious. A few students claimed to have seen Harry running through the corridors with the bleeding blond levitated next to him, though Ron and Hermione hadn't asked him about it; Harry would tell them in his own time.

Knowing Harry as Hermione did, she had the feeling that he blamed himself for whatever it was that happened to Draco. Normally she'd say that it wasn't his fault and that he did amazingly given the situation, though Harry's closed down attitude and depression worried her; what if it was his fault? She knew that he would never hurt Draco on purpose, well not too badly anyway, and even if he was the person to find Draco, what could he have done to help? He took him to the infirmary where Madam Pomfrey nursed him back to health, and as he was back to school a week later there can't have been any serious lasting damage. So why was Harry so upset? It didn't add up, so there was only one thing for it; research.

Harry removed his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger, the beginnings of a migraine once again thumping at his temples. He replaced his glasses and returned his gaze to the open marauder's map that lay strewn across his lap as he sat on his bed in the empty dorm. Draco's dot and corresponding label had been sat in the library for the past hour at least, moving occasionally to various book shelves only to return back to his seat and continue working. Harry had spent every spare minute he'd had scanning the map and keeping an eye on Draco and, most importantly Blaise. If Blaise's label came too close to Draco in an abandoned corridor or classroom Harry made his way towards them, but they never seemed to collide, much to Harry's relief.

Sighing resignedly Harry folded the map up so that the library, and Draco's marker, were on the outside, slipped it into his pocket, slid from his bed and made his way downstairs to the common room. Ron and Hermione were sat in their usual places on the large sofa by the fireplace, Hermione with a large, worn book on her lap, and Ron stroking Crookshanks, although by the vacant look in his eyes he seemed unaware that he was doing it. As Harry drew close to his friends he could hear Hermione's slightly stressed voice floating across the common room din of voices.

"-too worried about him Ron, he's obviously upset and as his best friends we should be doing more to help him." Harry slowed down slightly, approaching his friends from behind so they wouldn't see him coming.

"And what do you suggest we say Hermione? 'Hey Harry, we noticed you were miserable and guessed it had something to do with Malfoy and whatever it was that happened over the holidays and we were wondering, are you upset because the insufferable git didn't die or because you had something to do with the fact that he was covered in blood and close to death?'"

"Ron!" Hermione scolded, slamming her book shut and causing Crookshanks to dart under a nearby coffee table, Ron looking at her shamefully, his hand still poised where Crookshanks had been and full of ginger fur. "You can be so tactless sometimes!" Ron gaped at her, his mouth flapping open and shut a couple of times before he straightened his back defiantly.

"It's not like I was actually going to say that to him. Merlin Hermione, I'm not an idiot." Harry smiled slightly, he knew Ron didn't like Draco, and understandably so, and he knew that he would never had said that if he knew Harry was behind him. Deciding to interrupt his friends before a full blown argument erupted he walked round the side of the sofa into Ron's line of sight, a small smile forced onto his face. Ron's expression changed to mortification and his eyes widened in horror and fear that Harry had heard their conversation.

"Alright guys? Why's Ron an idiot this time?" He plonked himself down into the chair beside the sofa and watched as now both Ron and Hermione stared at him with open mouths and wide eyes. Hermione was of course the first to pull herself together and quickly coached her features into a calm sort of annoyance that only Hermione could pull off.

"Ronald has once again left his Potion's homework to the last minute and I was just reprimanding him for being an imbecile." By the look on Ron's face he didn't know whether to be relieved by his friend's quick thinking or affronted by her use of him as a scapegoat. He settled for grumbling under his breath and gazing moodily at the fire. A smile crossed Harry's lips as he shook his head at his best friend, and Hermione smiled slightly to herself to see the genuine happiness there; all was not lost.

The Golden Trio spent the next hour talking about homework and classes and friends and nothing at all really. Harry felt at ease for the first time since That Day and was glad for the company for once. Every so often, when Ron and Hermione were talking to one another, Harry would slide the corner of the marauder's map out of his pocket and check that Draco was still in the library. Hermione caught him looking at it once but knew better than to ask what he was looking at; they'd asked before and were met with only a vague explanation or silence.

After another half an hour of happy banter Harry once again removed the marauder's map, but this time was met by the name of Barry Maldon. Blinking twice to check it wasn't just his eyesight Harry realised Draco must have left the library and his seat had been taken by someone else. Pushing the map back into his pocket, Harry made a show of stretching his arms high into the air and yawning loudly. Ron finished laughing at his own joke, Hermione shaking her head at him with a small smile playing at her lips, and turned to Harry.

"Tired mate?" Harry nodded slowly, finishing his enormous yawn and rising from his chair.

"Yeah, think I'll call it a night." Ron looked at the clock on the wall, the smile on his face slipping slightly.

"It's only half seven. Plus we've got our Potion's homework to do yet, Hermione said she'd help us with it." Harry pretended to be mentally weighing up his options before shaking his head and slumping his shoulders in what he hoped was a tired looking manor.

"Sorry guys, some other time, I'm shattered." He gave them a little half wave and a smile and headed for the boys dormitory, getting quicker and quicker with every step. As he disappeared out of view Hermione shot Ron a worried glance and turned their conversation back to their best friend now that he'd left.

Harry threw open his dormitory door and ran to his bed, pulling the map from his picket and opening it out. He laid it on his bed, his eyes scanning the parchment quickly looking for the Slytherin prince's name. Soon enough he saw the little Draco Malfoy label wandering up the seventh floor corridor. Harry felt his heart beat slowing in his chest and took a deep, calming breath. He hated not knowing where Draco was, not knowing whether he was safe or not. He realised that this, whatever-it-was, was bordering on obsession, but he had to be sure. Draco turned and began to walk the other way, then again turned round and headed back up the corridor. He repeated this again and for a moment Harry's eyebrows furrowed until he realised where Draco was.

Draco's name disappeared from the map.

"Mischief managed." Harry muttered, wand in hand, as he began to fold up the now blank piece of parchment. He tucked it neatly into his jeans pocket, pulled on his invisibility cloak, placed a pillow under his duvet and closed the curtains around his bed. Taking the steps slower this time, he quietly walked into the common room, though the sound of voices and scratching quills masked any noise he made. He walked past Hermione and Ron and once again heard them talking about him but decided not to stay and listen. They wanted a private discussion about him and he had somewhere to be, plus he had a feeling he knew what their conversation was about anyway and didn't fancy hearing what else they had to say about him.

He waited impatiently by the entrance for a few minutes until finally a group of second years opened the portrait, books in arms, complaining about Madam Prince. Slipping through the open doorway before it closed, Harry quickly made his way to the Room of Requirement, not bothering too much about being quiet, just being unseen.

As he approached the stretch of wall that he knew concealed the hidden door he thought for just a moment he wasn't sure how he was going to find out which of its thousands of rooms Draco would be in, but just as quickly a smile crossed his face and he began to pace up and down.

_Show me our room, show me the room me and Draco share, the room where we can feel safe._

On his third trip past the blank wall a door materialised before him and Harry gingerly put his hand on the handle and pushed the door open.

The candles above the fire place were lit and there was steam coming from the spout of the tea pot. Looking over to their bed Harry saw Draco perched on the very edge, a mug of steaming tea in his hands. His posture was tense, nervous, even in their place of sanctuary he wasn't relaxed. The glamour that he'd had in place since returning from the holidays was gone and his true appearance caused Harry to gasp which in turn caused the blond to whip his head round and jump to his feet, his mug flying to the floor and smashing, spilling its contents everywhere.

His blond hair was lank and lifeless, his eyes dark and tormented, large black bags circling them. His skin was pasty, and much paler than usual, with an almost yellow tinge to it. His hands shook as he wrapped his arms around his chest and tried to look as unperturbed as possible.

"What do you want Potter?" Harry could tell he was trying to sound like his old, bitter self but there was no real edge to his voice, no real conviction. Harry's shoulder's sagged slightly as he took in how skinny and unkempt Draco was looking, and as Harry's face softened so too did Draco; his arms relaxed slightly and his whole body seemed to cave in on itself as he gently collapsed back onto the bed, still hugging his chest. Harry took a deep breath and walked over to the bed, sitting down next to the blond.

Silence followed. The silence stretched on for what felt like forever as the two boys sat, still as statues, waiting for the other to talk. Eventually, being the more impatient of the two, Harry had to speak.

"So," _Eloquent,_ Harry thought to himself, already mentally slapping himself for saying such a stupid thing. More silence followed. Again, after a shorter stretch this time, Harry could no longer take the silence. "Talk to me Draco."

The blond inhaled sharply at the sound of his first name being said by that mouth; he'd almost forgotten what it sounded like. All at once he wanted to break down and tell the brunette everything; about being locked in the basement, the beatings, the rape, everything, but just as he was about to open his mouth he managed to stop himself, his tongue already beginning to form his first word, but the sounds died before they began and once again, the silence stretched on.

"I want to help you." The unexpected sound of Harry's voice caused Draco to flinch slightly, why he wasn't sure, but before he could dwell on it any further he felt a hand gently touching his arm, like an anchor to the real world, pulling him away from his haunting memories. He turned his head slowly to look at the boy next to him and saw two large green eyes staring back at him. Never before had he been so captivated by a pair of eyes and before he could stop them, tears began to pour down his cheeks.

Harry's arms were around the blond before he even knew what he was doing, pulling him into a warm embrace, his hands running through his soft hair as he made gentle soothing noises.

"It's alright, I'm here; I'm not going to let anything happen to you." Draco's arms snaked round Harry's waist and clung on for dear life, sobs wracking his body like a physical pain. He was crying like he'd never cried before in his life, his insides hurt with the sheer amount of pressure his tears were releasing. He wailed and sobbed and bawled into Harry's shoulder, unable to stop the torrent now that it had started, all the while Harry was whispering reassurances and soothing noises into his ear.

When the sobbing died down and he finally found his voice he told Harry everything; from his father picking him up and taking his wand, to being locked in the basement and finally ending with the trauma in the shower. Throughout the story his head was buried in Harry's shoulder for fear of looking into those emerald eyes again, of losing himself to the flood of tears still welling below the surface. Harry was glad he didn't have to look at Draco because he was sure he'd have broken down too if he had to look at the despair in his face. The torment Draco had been through at the hands of his father was worse than he could have ever imagined, than he'd ever want to imagine. That Draco was still alive and reasonably sane was a miracle, and it cut Harry to pieces knowing that Draco had been through similar experiences throughout his entire life.

When Draco had finished he took a deep, shaky breath, breathing in the musky, slightly cinnamon smell of the boy that held him, and melted into the arms that still circled him. He felt like an enormous weight had lifted from above him, like the dark clouds that had been following him around had finally blown away on the winds; he felt free.

They sat once again in silence, though this time both comfortable in it. Eventually, when he'd managed to pull himself together a bit, Draco pulled away from Harry's chest and sat up, though he still didn't meet the brunette's gaze. He wiped his eyes and cleared his throat and looked anywhere but at Harry, his thoughts beginning to turn to how pathetic he must seem right now.

After a short while he could stand it no longer and Draco turned and looked Harry in the eyes; eyes brimming with tears and hurt and apology, his face awash with sympathy and regret. Harry's hand rose and touched Draco's cheek, his mouth opening and closing slightly, a plethora or words and encouragement waiting to spill over, but none of them sounding right enough to be said.

"I'm so sorry." He whispered eventually, Draco leaning into the hand that gently caressed his face. Again his mouth flapped uselessly, until finally he snapped it shut, realising that words could never convey the emotion he felt because no one should have to feel this way for another human being.

Draco smiled unconvincingly and pulled away from Harry's hand which slowly returned to his lap. "Don't be, it's not your fault and you couldn't have stopped it, no one can." Harry shook his head, his features hardening slightly.

"I might not be able to but someone else can, you just have to tell someone."

"I just did, I told you didn't I?" His gaze dropped to his lap and he chewed his lip uncertainly. "Thank you for listening, by the way."

Harry smiled slightly, but refused to drop the subject. "I meant someone else, someone that can help, like Dumbledore." Draco's eyes snapped to Harry's with a defiant air.

"I'll do no such thing; Dumbledore may be your admirer but he couldn't give a hippogriff's beak about me." Harry huffed in exasperation; bloody stubborn Slytherin's.

"Dumbledore does care; he cares about all of his students." Draco rolled his eyes and folded his arms, and as much as it infuriated Harry that the blond wasn't listening to reason, he was glad to have some semblance of the boy's character breaking through his hollow shell. "If not Dumbledore then someone else; what about Snape?" Draco's eyes snapped to Harry's, a look of mingled trepidation and scorn in them.

"No." The word was harsh and final, but Harry wasn't that easily put off.

"Just think about it."

"No!" Draco was pacing the floor before Harry even realised he'd got off the bed. "Severus is the closest thing my father has to a friend, and my father would literally _kill_ me if he found out I told someone about what he does to me, and to tell Severus would be like telling my father directly, and I don't have a death wish right now, so no." He continued to pace, clearly agitated by the current conversation, so Harry decided to drop it before the Slytherin stormed out; this was the most they'd spoken since that night in Gryffindor Tower.

"Alright," Harry stood, his hands up in surrender, and moved towards Draco. "Alright, just calm down." He tried to gently hold Draco's arms so he'd stop pacing, but the blond broke free from his grasp, an angry look on his face.

"I am calm!" He threw his hands in the air, walking to the opposite side of the room from Harry and continuing his pacing. "At least I was," He turned to point an angry finger at the other boy. "Until _you_ arrived! I'd been fine until now, I was coping fine." He resumed his trudging, making irritated hand gestures as he spoke. "I was getting on with life and I was fine. You always cock everything up don't you? You have to stick your nose in where it doesn't belong and throw everything up in the air, damn the consequences and damn the people that get caught up in the resulting whirlwind of destruction." His voice was rising hysterically and Harry was getting worried; clearly sadness wasn't the only emotion he'd been bottling up to the point of explosion.

"Draco," He tried to interrupt the tirade before it could be taken any further, but Draco was too lost in anger by this point.

"The Chosen One! You can't leave well enough alone; if you're not the centre of everyone's attention you have to fuck it all up so that you are. You couldn't just leave me to get on with it could you? I had a routine, my life had rules and order and I knew what to do and what not to do, how to feel and not to feel. I knew what to expect from people, I knew what I expected people to do to me, I knew my boundaries. Then you came alone and everything was dropped down a flight of stairs until I didn't know what was right anymore." Draco's whole body was shaking as he slowly wore a hole in the carpet by the side of the bed, his pace quickening with every angry word. Tears once again rolled down his cheeks but this time they were bitter and fell to floor without him noticing their presence. Harry took a tentative step closer to the blond as he ranted on, but Draco didn't even seem to notice he was there anymore, like he was talking to himself and had completely forgotten his surroundings.

"I'd accepted what was being done to me a long time ago and then you came along with your ideals and your stupid sense of right and wrong and you board your way into my skull until I began questioning what I'd been told my whole life. My father's word was law, it had structure and made sense and it was all I'd ever known." Harry was now standing at the end of the invisible track Draco had been walking up and down on and when the blond neared him again he firmly grasped him by his upper arms. The blonds head snapped up to face Harry, his face red and blotchy from frustration and crying, his eyes as angry as they were sad. He snarled nastily at the brunette, a look that nearly caused Harry's grip to loosen.

"I could deal with it, whatever they threw at me I could deal with it because I thought I deserved it. Then you had the nerve, the audacity, to shatter my world around me and screw it all up so I became a quivering wreck and challenged what my father taught me. You ruined everything, I was safe until you came along, they couldn't hurt me until you made me feel. It's your fault; why I feel like this, why my father did those things to me, why it hurts so fucking much, it's all your fault!" Draco's upsurge of abuse stopped due to his need to breath and he took in deep, ragged breaths, his eyes locked with Harry's, anger still bubbling away at the surface. Only when the anger began to subside did he notice that Harry had released his grip on him. Only then did he notice the pain in those normally care free emerald eyes. Only then did he realise the magnitude of his words.

Immediately his features softened and he took a gasping, sorrowful breath. It was now Draco's turn to grab Harry by the arms as he forced the Golden boy to look him in the eyes.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it Harry, I'm so sorry." The brunette attempted to smile but it came out as more of a grimace and Draco hated himself a little bit more. "I didn't mean any of it, not a word." He sighed and loosened his grip on Harry's arms, shaking his head slightly. "Merlin, if anything it's me that's always putting my foot in it." He let go of Harry's arms and pulled the boy into a tight hug, his arms pinned to his sides, a small, shocked gasp escaping his lips. "Ignore what I said, I owe you everything Harry, everything. I'm the man I am now because of you and I wouldn't change a thing." He tightened his grip for a brief moment before releasing Harry once more. "And that's why we have to stop seeing each other. My father knows about you, about us and whatever it is we have between us, and he will _kill_ you, and me, if he even _thinks_ that we're still in contact."

The sorrowful look in Harry's eyes was mimicked in Draco's and both boys stood in silence for a short while.

"I don't care." Harry whispered eventually, his voice catching in his throat for reasons he didn't want to think about.

"What?" Draco was sure he'd misunderstood the brunette; his father's threats were not something to be taken lightly.

"I said I don't care." Harry replied louder and with more conviction. "You're father can threaten me all he likes, I'm not abandoning you." Harry's face was set, his features stern and unyielding. Draco gave him a puzzled look before getting slightly angry again.

"This isn't a joke. My father has power, and he will use it." Harry smiled slightly which just infuriated Draco further. "It isn't funny Potter; do you want to get hurt? Because that's what will happen if you stay with me." Harry shook his head, that exasperating smile still on his face.

"Your father couldn't hurt me, he can't reach me in Hogwart's, and no one he knows has any idea where I go during the holidays, not even you." Draco sighed and looked to the heaven's, annoyed that his point wasn't getting across.

"It's not just my father you have to worry about," Harry scoffed, knowing where this conversation was leading.

"I'm not going to be scared off by Blaise either, sorry Draco, but you're stuck with me." He smiled good naturedly which caused Draco to snap.

"Not Blaise; me you idiot, it's me you have to be worried about!" Harry gave him a confused look and opened his mouth to speak, but Draco cut him off. "My father runs my life, at home and at Hogwart's. My whole life he's dictated everything I should do, should feel, should _be_." Harry stared at him in bewilderment, not understanding the point Draco was trying to make. Draco huffed and sat on the edge of the bed in resignation, cupping his face in his hands. "I'm just like him Harry, I can't be trusted." His last sentence was just louder than a whisper as Harry joined him on the bed.

"We've been over this Draco, you're nothing like you're-"

"Don't." Draco interrupted, "Don't say I'm not like him because you have no idea." He pulled his head out of his hands and wiped his damp cheeks. "I'm crying far too much today." He whispered, mostly to himself.

"I know you, and you're _nothing_ like Lucius Malfoy." Draco let out a laugh that was verging on hysteria.

"You don't know me Potter, and that's the problem. You have no idea what I'm capable of." His arms once again encircled his chest as he attempted to shield himself from the horrible truth. "The thoughts I get running through my head, the things I want to do to people; they're just like my father." Another bitter, slightly hysterical laugh left the blonds lips. "He's done such a good job raising his son to be a true Malfoy. I'm going to grow up to be just like him." His voice broke on the last word and he clamped his mouth shut for fear of crying more than he already had.

"No," Harry said defiantly, the blonds pale eyes locking with emerald. "I won't believe that, I can't believe that. I've seen you, the real you, and you're nothing like that man; you're kind and charming and funny." Draco let out a dry laugh.

"You're making me out to be some sort of Hufflepuff." Harry chuckled along with him and shook his head slightly.

"See what I mean? You're like no Malfoy I've ever had the displeasure of meeting, and that's a complement before you say anything." Draco smiled, unsure of a lot of things as he let the words sink in, but all too soon did visions of Draco hurting Harry invade his mind and the smile soon slipped away. "Hey," Harry pulled the blonds chin round so that they faced each other, and gently caressed his cheek with the back of his other hand. "You could never hurt me Draco, you don't have it in you." The brunette leant forwards, his eyes closing slowly, and he gently pulled the Slytherin into a long, soft kiss.

Draco's arms went limp by his sides, firm but gentle hands stroking his face and hair. Eventually he gained control of his body once more and his hands slid up Harry's body to rest on his stomach and shoulder blade. Slowly the hands wandered, caressing every contour and muscle they came in contact with. As gently as he could he pushed against Harry's chest and the Gryffindor complied by lying back on the bed, Draco mirroring his action so they're lips never severed.

Harry's hands moved to Draco's torso now, stroking his stomach, back, arms, arse, anything they could touch. As the groping continued it became more urgent, more frenzied, until finally the boys were tearing at each other's clothes so that they could touch flesh to sweaty flesh. Draco began to grind his throbbing erection against Harry's thigh causing them both to moan in unison.

"Fuck me." Harry whimpered into Draco's ear causing the blond to pause his grinding. He pulled his head back from placing soft, biting kisses down the other boy's neck and looked into Harry's eyes, his own cyan orbs unsure and slightly fearful.

"What?" His voice was hoarse with desire but uncertain; he wasn't sure if he could do that.

"Please," Harry begged, need evident in his voice. "Please fuck me."

"I-Harry, I don't think I can." Harry made a small thrust upwards causing their cocks to mash against one another, and groans of need to escape both men's lips. "Oh, Merlin help me." Draco breathed into Harry's ear, returning the gesture.

Hands were on Draco's belt and flies, undoing them clumsily, as lips locked with his, tongues fighting for dominance. His trousers and boxers were pulled down unceremoniously and he quickly pulled his feet free and kicked them to the floor. Straddling Harry's lap and freeing his hands, he made quick work of Harry's flies and discarded of his lower garments much more elegantly than the Gryffindor had done. He pulled himself up slightly and took in the look of the naked boy below him, a soft, hungry smile playing on his face. Harry smiled shyly and began to rove his eyes down Draco's body, but his head was pulled up by strong fingers and he was met with concerned, ashamed eyes.

"Don't look." Draco swallowed the lump in his throat, once again disgraced by his own body. Harry smiled serenely at him, his hands beginning to wander over Draco's bare chest once more.

"You're beautiful, Draco Malfoy, and don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise." Draco choked back a sob and began to plant hungry, passionate kisses behind Harry's ear, slowly moving down his neck and to his collar bone. The brunette shuddered with desire and thrust his hips upwards once more, his cock grazing Draco's inner thigh, causing the blond to bite his lip to stifle a load groan.

Draco pulled his hand up to Harry's face and inserted his middle finger into the boy's mouth. Immediately Harry began sucking and caressing the digit with his tongue, hungry for more. When Draco could stand it no longer he removed his finger, running it slowly down Harry's chest and the small trail of dark hair that lead to his groin. He quickly wrapped his hand around the throbbing erection he found there, eliciting a soft moan of longing from its owner. His hand then travelled lower until it reached Harry's entrance, and began to make small, inquisitive circles incurring the brunette to tremble, his back arching invitingly. Draco looked to him for conformation, still uncertain about what he'd been asked to do.

"Fucking hell Draco, stop being such a tease and do it already." Harry gave him a frustrated shake and Draco slowly inserted his finger, Harry's back arching again as he let out a long hiss between clenched teeth.

"Is that ok?" Draco whispered, his hand stilled. Harry whimpered, giving the blonde a small nod, afraid of the noises that would escape his mouth if he opened it. His finger twitched, causing Harry to shudder with anticipation, and then he began experimenting. Having never been the giver of such acts, let alone so lovingly giving them, he wasn't quite sure what he was doing; but by the not-so-soft moans and hisses escaping Harry's mouth, and the satisfied smile on his lips, he figured he was doing something right.

After a few minutes of stretching, Draco removed his fingers and bent Harry's left leg over his shoulder. Again, uncertain grey eyes met pleading emeralds. "For Merlin's sake Draco, stop stopping and just _do it_ already." Draco smiled lightly, pressed a gentle kiss to Harry's lips and pushed himself slowly inside. The Gryffindor gasped and muttered something that sounded like 'fuck yes' under his breath, but Draco was too caught up in his own feelings to notice.

The tightness, the warmth, the sheer pressure was pure ecstasy and Draco immediately lost himself in the sensation. It was more than he could have ever imagined and he hadn't even moved yet. Slowly he pulled backwards, closing his eyes against the pleasure he felt. This was what he'd been missing out on all these years, this was the reason he'd been put through so much; he could almost condone their actions, it was like nothing else on the planet. Again he thrust forwards, slightly faster this time, deeper, a guttural sob vibrating out of him. He was distantly aware of Harry panting below him, but his mind was lost, concentrating on his body alone.

His rhythm increased, as did the force of his thrusts, and he soon set a quick pace. His body had taken control; every thrust, every growl -his brain had taken a back seat and was happy to do so- everything was instinctive and lust fuelled. Harry's quiet appeals for a slower rhythm fell on deaf ears as the only sexual contact Draco had ever had began to guide his actions. His strokes became harder, deeper, and when Harry's hands pushed lightly at his hips to try and slow him down Draco grabbed his wrists and pinned them to the bed above his head. Harry's eyes glinted with alarm, but Draco saw nothing but red as the feeling of helplessness and vulnerability left him for the first time in years and the tables were turned.

It felt good to be in control, to be the one with power. He could hurt this body beneath him if he wanted, he could take and take and give nothing in return; this was his moment, his triumph. As the sound of distressed pleas reached his ears a malicious smile crossed Draco's face; this was why his father did it, why Blaise did it. Power, control, domination, all these things were his, to have someone completely at your mercy and know there's nothing they can do about it, this was worth hurting for.

All too soon Draco could feel the thrill of climax erupting within him and with one last, hard thrust he came, Harry wrapped around him, and collapsed in a heap on top of the shivering brunette. His breathing was ragged and he felt alive, truly alive for the first time in his life. With shaking arms he lifted his body up and pulled himself away from Harry, sitting back on his ankles. As he looked down to take in the sight before and him and the satisfied smile on his face quickly disbanded.

Harry was trembling, tears flowing from his fear filled eyes. His hands were still limp above his head, raw looking finger marks wrapped round his wrists. As Draco's gaze lowered he saw it; dark, thick blood, trickling down Harry's pale looking thighs and covering his own, contented cock. Time seemed to stop as the reality of his actions set in; he'd become his worst nightmare, releasing what he'd known was always inside him and promised to never let out, and to inflict this upon Harry, the only person in his life who gave a damn, who loved him. He was a monster, his father had been right.

Draco pulled himself off the bed in a daze, grabbed his clothes from the floor and dressed himself, his brain on auto pilot. He grabbed his wand from under a chair where it had fallen in their haste to remove their clothes, and made his way to the door. Pulling on the handle he stopped on the thresh hold and turned. Harry was still lying sprawled on the bed in the same position as Draco had left him, staring at the ceiling, defiled and broken. The blonde dropped his gaze to the floor; he thought about apologising, but nothing he said could make this better, make it right. He pulled his hand across his face, feeling dirtier and more disgraced than Blaise or his father ever could have made him feel, and walked out the door, shutting it behind him. Immediately the door dissolved into a blank stretch of wall and Draco found himself staring at it.

No longer was it their room, their place of sanctuary, Draco had destroyed it, tainted it. After years of trying to please Lucius, when he'd finally decided to abandon the facade, he'd become a true Malfoy, annihilating the little piece of happiness he'd manage to scrape together with Harry's help. His hand rose and caressed the cold stone in front of him.

"I'm sorry. Sorry you ever saw me on the bathroom that night." Draco turned away from the wall, from the room, from Harry, and managed to drag himself, unseeing, down to the dungeons and into his dorm room. Opening the green silk curtain he crawled onto his bed, laid on his back and tried desperately to rid himself of the image of Harry crying and bleeding on their bed.

**A/N:** *does a little dance* I finally updated, I can't believe how long I've left it and I'm so sorry! I watched Sherlock, the 3 part TV series the other day with Benedict Cumberbatch (best name in the world, ever!) and Martin Freeman and it was awesome! My muse came running straight back from her little get away and wanted to write, write, write! But I explained that if she wanted to write Sherlock/Watson fan fiction she'd have to finish what she started first, and that was that! I suddenly had all this inspiration to finish this story and the words just flowed onto the page. As you read this I'm currently working on, what I think will be, the final chapter; depending on how long it ends up being I may make it into two chapters, but it is nearly over! Again, it may take me ages to finish this but I'm not reading/writing Sherlock ff until I've finished this story, and I _really_ want to read Sherlock ff, so away I write! Thank you for being patient, and I hope you enjoyed reading this. Please review, it always motivates me to move my arse into gear, constructive criticism welcomed.


	11. Forgiveness

_**Chapter 10 - Forgiveness**_

Harry finally managed to get his last shirt button through its hole, a feat made infinitely harder by his still shaking hands. Clenching and unclenching them he took hold of the bed sheets below him and gripped them until his knuckles turned white, his eyes screwed up against the painful memories racing through his head. After a few fruitless moments he gingerly lifted himself off the bed, wincing at the pain it caused him. He limped across the room to the bathroom and stood in front of the mirror above the sink. His skin was blotchy, his hair more messy than usual, and his eyes red. Lowering his head and running the cold tap, he liberally splashed his face with water.

He felt weak, scared, unsure of what to do next. He rested his hands on the sink basin, his head bowed, and was instantly reminded of his first meeting with Draco, the blonde bleeding and in pain, leaning over a sink much as he was now. Thinking of the blonde brought up a mix of emotions that made Harry feel sick to his stomach and he once again splashed water on his face.

Leaving the bathroom he walked back into the main room to collect his shoes from the bedside. As he reached the side of the bed he felt the soles of his feet becoming wet and when he looked down he saw the remains of the broken mug on the floor, his feet in the puddle of cold tea left by the offending item. He remembered the frightened look on Draco's face when he'd first entered the room, but all too soon it changed to the smirking face of the boy who'd raped him and the sick feeling returned.

Grabbing his wand from his pocket he used a quick cleaning spell to banish the tea from his feet and the floor and then put his shoes on. He glanced at the bed, the blood stain still marking the satin sheets, and dragged his eyes away quickly, running to the bathroom and making it to the toilet just in time to throw up the contents of his stomach. Tears stung at his eyes as he pulled the flush, rose from the floor and rinsed his mouth with some tap water.

He left the bathroom, his feet a little unsteady, and headed straight for the exit, not looking back until the he was the other side of a blank stretch of wall. The stone before him hid so many memories, memories that until now had been full of laughter, fun and idle chat. He was unsure if he'd ever be able to return to that room, but for now he just wanted to get as far away from it as possible. He threw the invisibility cloak over his head, hands still shaking slightly, and made his way slowly to Gryffindor tower.

Once outside the entrance he muttered the password, much to the bemusement of the fat lady, and walked through the archway into a mostly empty common room. A few heads turned to look at the seemingly empty doorway, wondering why the fat lady had swung open, but quickly returned to their conversations. Ron and Hermione however, who were still sat on the sofa by the fireplace, kept their eyes locked on the arch, knowing all too well why the fat lady was currently ajar.

Harry took a deep breath, watching his best friends as they gave each other a knowing glance, and made his way up to his dormitory. Thankfully it appeared that Dean and Seamus were still in the common room as their beds lay empty, though a soft snoring was coming from behind the drawn curtains of Neville's bed. Harry had enough time to stow his invisibility cloak in his trunk and take his shoes off before Ron opened the door to the shared bedroom, giving him a concerned smile.

"Alright mate?" Ron asked tentatively, walking over to his own bed and plonking himself on the edge, removing his shoes and discarding them haphazardly underneath it. Harry removed his wand from his pocket and put it on his bedside table, taking a seat on his own bed before looking at Ron with a forced smile on his face. He planned on saying fine, he really did, but he just didn't have the strength or the energy to lie.

"Not really." His voice was croaky from crying and the smile slowly slipped from his mouth, his mask of composure failing. Ron's smile also fell away as he began to really worry about his friend.

"Want to talk about it?" Harry let out a half laugh and shook his head.

"Not really." Ron nodded in understanding, knowing Harry wasn't a massive sharer of his feelings, and being a little relieved because sharing feelings wasn't exactly his forte either.

"Hermione's worried about you." Ron cleared his throat, playing with a piece of thread that dangled from his robe hem, and Harry knew he meant they were both worried, Ron would just never say it. Harry smiled and pulled his pyjamas out from under his pillow and began to change, trying not to show how much it hurt for him to move.

"I know, tell her I'm sorry for worrying her, I've just got a few things on my mind, that's all." He pulled his pyjama bottoms on and wrenched his shirt off over his head, immediately wishing he hadn't.

"Harry, what are those?" The brunette turned to his friend, a puzzled expression on his face, as Ron looked at him with concern.

"What are what?" He looked down at his torso, praying Draco had left him unscathed. Ron rose from his bed and walked up to Harry, taking him by the elbow and holding his arm out so that the red imprints of Draco's hands were evident on his wrist.

"Those." Ron reiterated and Harry felt his gut sinking and his mouth dry out, visions of how he got those marks flooding his mind. His hands began to quiver once more as he pulled his arm out of Ron's grip.

"It's nothing, don't worry about it." His voice was shaky and he had to sit on the edge of his bed for fear of his legs collapsing from underneath him. Ron shook his head, his expression anxious and angry that someone could do that to his friend.

"It's not nothing Harry!" Ron took a deep breath, trying to stem the anger that was rapidly rising within him. "Who did it?" Harry turned to his friend with pleading eyes.

"Ron-"

"No Harry, tell me who did it?" Ron's hands were clenching into fists without him even realising it and Harry didn't like where this conversation was leading.

"Look, just drop it alright? I'm fine, it's sorted, you don't need to worry about it." He pulled his pyjama top over his head and swung his legs onto the bed and under the duvet, trying desperately not to show how much the action pained him. Ron was shaking his head, his fists still clenched, but he looked resigned to the fact that this conversation was going nowhere.

"But I do worry Harry, me and Hermione have done nothing but worry since we got back from holiday. Something's going on with you, something big, we're not stupid." Ron's body relaxed in defeat and he walked back to his bed, pulling out his own pyjamas and changing into them, glancing occasionally at his suffering friend. "We're your best mates Harry; you're supposed to be able to trust us with anything."

Harry could hear the hurt in Ron's voice and hated himself for putting his friends through all this trouble for something they could never help him with. "I do trust you Ron, but it's not an issue of trust, it's just something that me and... another person have got to work through."

"If those marks are this person's idea of 'working things through' then I'm going to punch them in the face, I don't care what you say." Harry sighed tiredly; now that he was in his bed and under the covers he was overcome with exhaustion and didn't have the mental capacity to continue the conversation.

"I'll be fine Ron, I promise." He watched his friend slowly nod his head before he too climbed into bed, and for once he fell asleep before the red head, Ron watching him long after he'd drifted off, too worried for fatigue to capture him and lull him to sleep.

For the next few days Harry tried to forget what happened in the Room of Requirement, only managing to go a handful of minutes at a time before the events came flooding back to the forefront of his mind and he'd find his hands shaking once again. However, as the days stretched on he was able to go longer and longer between visions, and they became less vivid, less realistic, until he could almost convince himself it was a bad dream. Only when he shared a class with Draco, or saw the blonde from across the courtyard, did the images come back in full force, his body beginning to tremble, his legs becoming weak, and that gut churning sickness returning.

Hermione and Ron noticed the change in their friend, how could they not, but as Harry wouldn't talk to them there wasn't a lot they could help him with. They still didn't understand why, though Ron had told Hermione about the bruises on Harry's wrist, but they had no idea who had put them there.

Draco was going through his own turmoil of course; he did his best to avoid the brunette, to the point of not taking any of the passages and corridors the Gryffindor frequented, sitting as far away from him as possible in the classes they shared, and making no eye contact with him at all. Having perfected the act of watching people without looking at them Draco could see how much his presence affected Harry and therefore tried to minimise it, not wanting to cause him any more pain than was necessary. He'd began skipping lunch and dinner, only going to the Great Hall for breakfast, and doing so as early as possible so he could leave before Harry arrived. A couple of times he'd catch sight of Harry entering the Great Hall before he'd had a chance to leave, but he would quickly get up from his seat and attempt to leave before the brunette noticed him.

A week after The Incident, Draco was on his way to the library, his head bowed, eyes watching his feet, mind reeling with thoughts and memories, when another student walked around the corner and straight into him. Draco lost his balance, his head colliding with the stone wall before his hands could reach out and stop it, and the other person was sent sprawling to the floor, their bag exploding its contents everywhere. Clutching his head, Draco slid to the floor, a trickle of blood running from between his fingers and down the back of his hand, his vision blurred by tiny black spots.

"Are you-" a voice began from somewhere to his right, but stopped abruptly, the question left mid sentence. Groaning faintly, Draco dragged his hands away from his eyes enough to look for the person he'd crashed into. His eyesight still fuzzy, he could just about make out the silhouette of a body lying on their back a few feet away from him, propping themselves up on their elbows so they could look at Draco. Blinking furiously to try and clear his vision, Draco only succeeded in making his growing headache worse. As it worsened he began to feel sick and before he knew what was happening he was sliding down the wall into a heap on the floor, unconscious.

A short while later he regained consciousness and screwed his eyes up against the pain in his forehead, again lifting his hand to the offending area.

"Try not to move, I think you have a concussion." Even through the haze Draco was able to recognise who the voice belonged to, and as he slowly fluttered his eyelids open and found himself gazing into those familiar emerald eyes, full of concern and a little fear, he was reminded of their first meeting.

"Harry." He whispered, noticing that his head was once again resting on the brunette's lap, cradled between his trembling hands. He pulled himself upright quickly, his head swimming as he did so, and tried to gain some balance by leaning heavily on the floor and wall. He felt a hand rest on his back, trying to help steady him, but all he could feel was it shaking, and he was the reason for that. "Let go." He murmured, attempting to stand but only managing to pull himself to his hands and knees. Harry's hands returned to his lap, clasping each other tightly in an effort to stop them from trembling.

"You shouldn't try to stand, your head-"

"Stop it, Harry." Draco interrupted the Gryffindor, unable to bare the words of sincere concern. "I don't deserve your kindness, not after-" he let the sentence die on his lips and once again tried to stand, this time managing the feat whilst leaning heavily on the wall.

Silence fell; Harry still knelt on the floor, Draco with the back of his head resting against the cool stone venturing to calm the throbbing in his temples. As his brain slowly stopped rattling around his head, he turned his gaze to Harry, the brunette staring at his lap. Draco felt a lump rising in his throat and he pushed himself away from the wall, determined not to look vulnerable, not in front of Harry of all people. Clearing his throat he began picking up the contents of Harry's bag and was quickly joined by the Gryffindor. A few moments later, with his arms full, Draco turned to Harry who held open his half filled bag so the last of his books, parchments and quills could be dropped inside.

Draco offered a tight smile which Harry returned shyly, and they both stood staring at each other, neither moving, until the words spilled from Draco's mouth before he could stop them.

"I'm sorry." Harry shook his head and held up a pardoning hand.

"No, it was my fault; I wasn't looking where I was going." Draco's eyes fell to the floor and his jaw clenched involuntarily.

"That's not what I meant." Harry's gaze dropped to the floor as well as he let out a soft 'oh' of understanding. "I know it doesn't mean much, and no amount of apologising could ever take back what I did to you, but I am truly sorry." He lifted his eyes to look at Harry once more, the brunette mirroring his actions. "I'm not looking for forgiveness, I don't expect you to ever forgive me; I just wanted you to know." Draco's hand moved towards Harry of its own accord, but when the other boy flinched slightly it dropped instantly to his side again. "I never meant to hurt you." He whispered, tears stinging just behind his eyes.

"I know." Harry whispered in return. Draco nodded slightly, clenching his hands into fists, angry at himself once again, before turning and walking as quickly as he could away from the brunette.

Draco walked and walked, his feet guiding him whilst his mind replayed his conversation with Harry. He was angry that he'd run into the boy when he'd been so careful to avoid him until now; he could see how much their encounter had upset the Gryffindor; the boy was practically vibrating with terror. At least he'd told him that he was sorry, that he'd never meant to hurt him, though he was sure it brought him more comfort than it did Harry; as they both knew, his actions could never be undone. His mind racing still, Draco turned down a seemingly empty corridor. Empty until Crabbe immerged from a classroom in front of him and blocked the way forwards; when he turned to walk back the other way he bumped into the chest of a leering Goyle. Crabbe grabbed his arms and held them tightly behind his back, dragging him into the classroom he'd exited from. As Draco had expected, Blaise was leant against a desk near the door, his arms folded and his left ankle crossed over his right, a slight smirk on his face. At the sight of Draco's indifferent face and cold eyes his smirk faltered and his arms tightened around him slightly.

"How nice of you to join us Draco." Blaise rose and walked towards the blonde as he shook his arms free from Crabbe's grasp. Draco took a step forward, stopping Blaise in his tracks, and glared fiercely at him.

"I'm not putting up with your shit today Blaise, _not_ today." Blaise' mouth flapped uselessly as Draco sneered at him a moment longer before turning and leaving the room, Crabbe and Goyle looking as flabbergasted as Blaise. The three Slytherin's stood in shock for a minute longer before skulking off to their common room, resigned to defeat, this time at least, whilst Draco continued to pace the school.

Harry returned to the Gryffindor tower in a mixture of moods and sat himself down in a vacant chair, holding his head in his hands and pushing his palms into his eyes.

"Sickle for your thoughts." Harry lifted his head to see Hermione take the seat next to him, a frown crossing her face when she saw him. "Are you bleeding?" Harry looked at her in confusion and looked down at his hands. There was a small smear of blood across his left palm that must have come from Draco's head wound, and by the look Hermione was giving him he'd wiped it on his face.

"It's not mine." His words didn't seem to ease Hermione's mind as she leant forwards, her wand in hand, and quickly vanished the offending liquid from both his hand and face. "I knocked into someone and they cut their head on the wall." Hermione relaxed slightly, sitting back in her chair.

"I hope they're alright." Harry nodded slightly, thinking about the blonde and how unsteady he'd been on his feet.

"So do I." Hermione narrowed her eyes slightly, sensing there was something more to this exchange than a chance meeting between to random students.

"Anyone we know?" She asked, trying to sound casual but gauging Harry's every move.

"Hmm?" Harry turned to Hermione, his mind briefly lost in thought, before clearing his throat and averting his eyes to the carpet. "Oh, no, I don't think so." Hermione could instantly tell her friend was lying, but talking to Harry about personal matters required a little finesse, so she didn't press the matter without thinking about it.

They sat quietly for a while, the sounds of the noisy common room filling their ears; friends talking and laughing, quills scratching parchment, Trevor the toad croaking from some unknown hiding place. Hermione took a deep breath and leant forwards in her chair, her eyes fixed on Harry's face as he stared blankly at his hands resting in his lap.

"Harry," Hermione waited for the brunette to turn to her before she continued. "I'm going to ask you some questions and I'd like you to answer them as truthfully as possible." Harry sunk into his chair a little further, his expression anxious.

"I'm not going to like these questions am I?" Hermione touched him lightly on the knee for reassurance.

"I know you've heard this already, but Ron and I are worried about you and we just want to help. I understand that it might be a little hard for you to talk to us about a few things, but I have some theories, so just humour me, please?" After a few silent moments Harry sighed resignedly and nodded, slumping even further in his chair as Hermione took her hand from his knee and returned it to her lap.

"The reason you've been so... out of sorts lately," Hermione decided to pick her words carefully for fear of ending the conversation prematurely, "has something to do with Malfoy, doesn't it?" Harry's eyes widened slightly and his gaze slid from Hermione to the floor, and that was all the answer that she needed. "I don't expect you to tell me what happened over the holidays, but you had something to do with it, didn't you?"

"I didn't hurt Draco if that's what you mean." 'Draco', Hermione noted, not Malfoy.

"That's not what I meant." She paused, again thinking of how to ask her questions carefully. "Some students have been saying they saw you levitating Malfoy to the hospital wing." Harry's eyes snapped back to Hermione; he'd been too preoccupied trying to save the blondes life to notice if anyone had seen him, though now he thought about it, someone must have done, it was a long way from that lonely room to the hospital wing. "They also said that Malfoy was quite badly hurt." Harry took a deep breath, sitting forwards and resting his elbows on his knees.

"Yeah," Harry had to clear his throat to move the lump that had formed there, images of Draco lying naked and bleeding rising from the depths he'd tried to hide them in. "He wasn't in a good way." His voice was quiet and shaky, and once again he was fighting to stop his hands from trembling. Hermione watched him, the pain evident on his face, and thought intensely about her next few questions.

"You really like Malfoy don't you?" Harry glanced at Hermione quickly before turning his attention back to his hands as he nervously dug the dirt from under one of his finger nails.

"He's not that bad, not really." He thought long and hard about his time with Draco over the holidays, the good and the bad, and was happily surprised when a small smile crossed his face. His smile soon faded as he thought of all crap the Slytherin had been put through by the people he was supposed to trust. "He just acts like a horrible person because people have been horrible to him his whole life." Hermione nodded slowly, pausing to think about what had been said.

"And the people that hurt Mal-Draco over the holidays, do you know who they were?" Harry turned to look at his friend, his eyes beseeching.

"Please don't ask me that Hermione." His voice was close to cracking and Hermione was quick to nod her head, feeling for some illogical reason like she might cry.

"Alright," She took a steadying breath before continuing with the questions that she knew would hurt the most. "Did they give you the bruises on your wrists?" Harry shook his head, afraid to speak in case his voice failed him. Hermione opened and closed her mouth a few times before building up the courage to ask the next question. "Did Draco?" His eyes snapped to Hermione, a look of shame, fear and gratification that someone else _knew_ on his face. "Oh Harry." Hermione was on the edge of her chair before she remembered they were still in the common room and she managed to stop herself before she jumped from her chair and gave Harry a chest crushing hug. "Shall we talk somewhere more private?" Harry opened his mouth and a strangled noise that sounded something like a 'yes' escaped it.

He and Hermione rose from their seats and headed to the boys dormitory. Before Harry had even closed the door to his empty bedroom Hermione's arms were around his neck and he could feel hot tears seeping through his shirt.

"It's alright Hermione," he finished closing the door and wrapped his arms awkwardly around Hermione's waist. "I'm ok."

"How can you say that?" She pulled her head away from Harry's shoulder, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "How can you say he's not that bad when he's hurt you like he has?" Harry sighed, at a loss for what to say.

How did he know Draco was a nice person? If he went through what Draco had been through he'd be a little twisted, a little fucked up. He thought he had it bad living with the Dursley's, but being shut in a cupboard without dinner is one thing, being beaten and raped and locked in a cellar for a week is something entirely different. Draco had _turned_ for a brief moment, turned into the deranged, tormented monster Lucius had always wanted him to be. It may have been brief, but he'd done it. What's to say he wouldn't do it again? What if this was exactly how Lucius had become what he was today; his father just hurt him and hurt him until he became a monster, and he was now passing on the only thing he knew how to give; abuse? What if Draco was destined to turn into a monster, just like his father?

But Harry knew that wasn't true, there was something in Draco, something good and decent, that Lucius Malfoy could never have possessed.

"It was a... lapse in judgement, a mistake, one I know Draco's going to punish himself for, for the rest of his life." Hermione stared hard into Harry's eyes, and saw nothing but honesty and hope. She nodded.

"Just be careful Harry, I can't stand the thought of you getting hurt." She pulled Harry into another crushing hug, squeezing him tightly and not letting go until he'd used up nearly all his oxygen. "I won't tell Ron about Malfoy, not that he'd believe me anyway. But if he hurts you again Harry-"

"He won't," Harry interrupted, a sad smile on his face. "We're not," he paused, trying to figure out what they were in the first place; friends? Lovers? Boyfriends? "Friends anymore, not after-" He let the words fade before he said them, his eyes going out of focus for a moment as his mind cast back to that night. Hermione returned his sad smile, staring into his face for a long time before placing a lingering kiss on his cheek.

"I can't believe I'm saying this, to you of all people, but don't let your brain do all the thinking, will you? Sometimes the heart knows what's best for a person more than the brain does. Not everything's logic and facts and straight up wrong and right." She placed a hand over Harry's heart, feeling the beat of it quickening slightly. "Listen to what's going on in here won't you?"

Harry stood bewildered for a moment, his eyes fixed on Hermione's hand on his chest, before looking into her warm, comforting eyes, and smiling. He gave a small nod and they once again embraced, Hermione's grip not quite as strong as before. Once the moment passed and Hermione left Harry to his thoughts, wishing him a good night's sleep, the brunette made his way to his bed and clambered onto it, rolling on to his back and not bothering to change.

He lay like this for a long time, his mind ablaze with thought. It was a few hours before the first of his roommates ascended the stairs into their dorm and Neville gave him a warm good night before crawling sleepily into bed and wrapping the duvet around him. Harry decided now would be a good time to change and so climbed into his pyjamas and under his own duvet before returning his thoughts to more pressing matters.

Half an hour or so later and Seamus and Dean entered the room, their voices lowered in a hushed discussion. Their conversation lasted fifteen minutes or so after they'd got into their own beds, but eventually lethargy caught up with them and they joined Neville in sleep.

Ron was the last to arrive, at least another half an hour later. He looked at Harry as soon as he entered the room, giving him a slight nod of acknowledgement, before silently dressing in his pyjamas and curling into a ball under his covers. Harry still lay on his back, his eyes on the ceiling, whilst Ron watched him worriedly, though silently. Ultimately though, sleep captured the red head and only Harry was left, wide awake and staring, his mind still reeling and whirring and far from tiredness. Just before day break, when the sky outside was still black but a slight blue tint was beginning to mar it, Harry's mind and heart were made up and a decision was made. Taking a resolute, determined breath, Harry finally turned on his side and was almost immediately asleep, and though the sleep was short lived, it was deep and full and he awoke feeling more rested than he had done in a long time.

It was just after lunch the next day and Draco had just left the Great Hall in slightly higher spirits than normal. His mind had been in a completely different place after he'd left his last lesson of Herbology, and he'd ended up following a couple of his class mates without really paying much attention to where they were headed, and before he knew it he was seating himself at the Great Hall in time for lunch. He'd been avoiding the place because of Harry and as he looked up to scan the hall for the brunette before making a hasty retreat he saw him and his two favourite Gryffindor's entering the hall. He swallowed and was about to duck down so as not to be seen when Harry's bright green eyes turned and locked with his. Time seemed to stand still, Draco's facial expression like a deer trapped in headlights and Harry's unreadable. Draco was about to break eye contact and try and drown himself in his soup when Harry smiled weakly and gave him and polite nod before turning and following his friends to their table.

Draco had sat dumbfounded by their brief interaction for a good ten minutes before another Slytherin pointed out how utterly retarded he looked staring blankly at his soup, and so he had eaten his fill and left the hall. As he left he chanced a glance at the Gryffindor table and his eyes once again locked with emerald. Draco was the first to smile this time, a sheepish, uncertain smile, and he was quickly rewarded by a sad but friendly smile from Harry. And so he left the Great Hall, his stomach full with the first lunch he'd eaten in over a week, with a wide grin on his face and made his way to the library to do some studying and stare out the window whimsically.

Harry turned back to the conversation Hermione and Ron were having about getting their homework done that night, a conversation Ron was losing badly.

"Help me out here mate." He pleaded with his friend, and Harry chuckled lightly.

"Sorry Ron, I'm not arguing with her, you know we never win." Hermione pursed her lips, trying to decide whether or not to let the comment go, when movement at the Slytherin table caught Harry's eye. The person he'd been waiting for was getting up to leave, his henchmen in tow, and Harry knew now was the time to make his move.

"Sorry guys, I've got to go." He said, rising from his seat at the table and taking one last bite of his buttered roll.

"Where are you going?" Ron asked feeling abandoned when he needed Harry's help the most.

"There's some stuff I need to do, and no it can't wait." He added when he saw Ron's mouth open, knowing his question before he asked it. "I'll see you in Charms in about an hour." He turned from the table, throwing a wave goodbye over his shoulder, and walked out the Great Hall, picking up the pace once out of view of his friends. He could just see the hem of three cloaks disappearing at the top of the stairs and rushed to catch up with them.

After flying up the last step Harry turned to his right and saw the three Slytherin's walking down the corridor, the blond in front gesturing wildly with his hands as he angrily explained something to his two larger companions. Harry took a deep breath and headed towards them; it was now or never.

"Oi, Zabini!" Harry shouted, causing the blond to turn, his arms still held out in mid gesture. He gave Harry a puzzled, slightly fearful look before he scanned the corridor for any sign of a teacher. "It's just me, I need a word." Zabini looked him up and down, still obviously confused, Crabbe and Goyle stood just behind him on either side looking as bewildered as ever.

"About?" He asked petulantly, his chin raised slightly in defiance. Harry couldn't help but snarl slightly, his hands clenching into fists at the sheer _nerve_ of the boy. A flash of fear passed across Blaise' face, his chin lowering in submission; even he knew Harry was not one to be messed with.

"About Draco." He said the words through clenched teeth, fear once again showing briefly on Blaise' face. The blond swallowed visibly, his eyes roving over Harry and then up and down the corridor once more. As he turned away from Harry to look down the corridor behind him, an idea struck, and he was glad not to be looking at the brunette as he couldn't help the small smirk that crossed his lips. He turned back to Harry, all traces of the smirk gone and gestured to an empty classroom to his left. Harry walked in, his knuckles white from clenching his hands so tightly, but Blaise was beside himself with happiness.

He turned to Crabbe and Goyle, the pair still looking as though Dumbledore had skipped past in a pink tutu, and nodded at them leering, then tilted his head towards the classroom. Goyle caught on quicker than Crabbe, and he nudged his companion in the arm, his eyes wide like a predator about to kill his prey. You could practically see the cogs turning in Crabbe's brain but eventually it clicked and a twisted smile crossed his face.

"Are you coming or what?" Harry's angry voice carried across the thick air from deep within the classroom. Blaise, still smirking triumphantly, followed Crabbe and Goyle into the classroom, turning and closing the door behind him.

"I wouldn't miss this for the world." He turned his hungry eyes on Harry and the brunette's anger briefly gave way to confusion as the three Slytherin's made their way across the room towards him.

Draco tore his gaze from the window for the umpteenth time that afternoon and turned his attention back to Professor McGonagall with difficulty. She was blathering on about turning a platypus into a working chemistry set, something Draco could do with his wand hand tied behind his back, and he was finding it so hard to concentrate, what with images of a smiling Harry filling his head. He never thought he'd be on the receiving end of one of those smiles again, even if it was sad and a little strained; he'd cherish it for a long time to come.

The sadness in that smile still puzzled him; there could be a hundred reasons for it, all revolving around Draco, and it was something he couldn't seem to take his mind off of. Eventually the lesson ended and Draco quickly packed up his things and left. He began walking the corridors, no real destination in mind as lessons were now over and he had no desire to return to his common room. The rush of footsteps around him died down until only a few distant steps could be heard echoing behind him. He was distantly aware that something felt wrong, but then he noticed he'd wandered subconsciously to the Room of Requirement and supposed that was the reason for it. He glanced briefly at the expanse of blank wall, behind which an infinite number of rooms waited to be called upon, some of which would probably never be seen again, before quickening his pace and trying to push all thoughts of the room from his mind.

This was quite easy as when he rounded the nearest corner a pair of heavy, thick fingered hands crashed into his back sending him flying through an open classroom door and onto the cold, stone floor; face first. There was a sickening crunch and a searing pain exploded in Draco's nose causing the blond to cry out and clutch at the broken appendage, blood trickling from between his fingers and on to the classroom floor. Goyle's laugh sounded from somewhere behind him, closely followed by the sound of a door clicking closed and the muttering of locking and concealing charms.

"Ooh, did we do that?" Blaise said mockingly as he bent down at Draco's side, eyeing his bloodied face with feigned concern. "Don't worry, we'll fix you up good as new, won't we boys?" Again the laughs of Goyle and Crabbe echoed through the otherwise empty room.

Draco was unceremoniously wrenched to his feet, one of Crabbe's hands wrapped in the back of his robe, the other through his hair. He winced again in pain but this time managed to stop from crying out. He wasn't going to give them the satisfaction this time; this time he'd go quietly.

"I didn't think much of your attitude yesterday." Blaise mused almost to himself as he circled the blond. Crabbe dragged him to the nearest table and threw him on it, his back hitting the hard wood and sending a jolt of pain up his spine, his back arching as he bit down on his tongue to keep any sound from escaping his lips. Blaise loomed over him as Crabbe moved to hold the blondes hands down above his head. "In fact I thought it was quite _fucking rude_." Blaise's mood changed from sarcastic to pure madness within seconds. His hand shot out from his side and grasped a huge handful of Draco's hair, lifting his head and slamming it onto the hard wood of the table. "I'll not have you forget your place, Malfoy." The name was spat from his mouth with such ferocity that Draco's legs began to shake involuntarily.

Draco's trousers were round his ankles with one flick of Blaise's wand. Another flick and ropes wrapped themselves round Draco's wrists, twisting to force him onto his front and attaching themselves to the table. Draco's eyes screwed shut, blocking out the sights around him. He wanted to disappear, to be anywhere else but here. His mind instantly thought of Harry, of flying around the grounds and sitting by the lake in the snow. But his peaceful thoughts were interrupted as he felt Blaise's fingernails dig into the top of his back and gouge skin from his flesh as they travelled downwards and across his thighs.

_You deserve this,_ a small voice in his head uttered. _This is how Harry felt when you violated him, only he trusted you. You're prepared for this, you were supposed to love him and instead you put him through this. _Tears welled in Draco's eyes and his body went limp. He felt Blaise pushing against his entrance but didn't care. He did deserve this, he deserved all this and worse for what he did to Harry. He wouldn't fight back this time.

Draco concentrated on every horrible moment he endured, from Blaise's first touch, to the groan of pleasure as he came over Draco's back, tears spilling down his cheeks the whole time. As Blaise pulled his own trousers up and finished doing them up, he flicked his wand and the ropes binding Draco vanished causing the blond to slump to the floor. Blaise sneered at him, disappointed.

"That was it?" Draco reached for his trousers and pulled them back up, shaking hands taking longer than usual to do them up. Blaise continued to stare at him in disgust as he did, shaking his head once he'd finished. "That was hardly worth my time." Blaise cast a cleaning charm on himself and leant against an empty desk. As he did so an idea popped into his head and an evil smirk crossed his face. "Well at least I got my satisfaction elsewhere earlier on." Draco didn't seem to be listening to what was being said as he lifted himself from the floor, trembling, and tried to rearrange his robes. "You know him actually; he's become a very close _friend_ of yours recently," The way Blaise spat the word 'friend' from his mouth made Draco stop what he was doing to listen, much to Blaise's amusement. "He has dark hair, green eyes, and a stupid scar on his forehead." Draco froze to the spot, surely Blaise didn't mean what he thought he meant. "He was much more entertaining than you've been lately," Draco slowly turned to face Blaise, an unreadable expression on his face. Blaise was smiling maliciously at him, revelling in the attention he'd finally gained. "He put up a struggle, don't think he was keen on what was going on, but I soon broke him in and had screaming my na-"

Before Blaise could finish his sentence Draco's fist had collided with his nose, the sound of the bone breaking echoed through the room as the teen went sprawling to the floor. Blaise had enough time to roll over and stare petrified at Draco, his face covered in blood, before the blond jumped on top of him and began punching every inch of flesh he could reach.

Crabbe and Goyle ran to Blaise's aid and pulled the blond from his lap, but as Draco thrashed and punched and kicked everything he came in contact with, they very quickly lost their grip on him and he once again launched himself on top of Blaise. The other boy had managed to crawl about three feet before Draco's fist connected with his ribs, winding him and causing him to collapse to the floor once more.

"I'll fucking kill you!" Draco screamed as more punches and kicks collided with Blaise's quivering form. "If you've hurt him I'll fucking kill you!" Again Crabbe and Goyle attempted to restrain him, but this time Crabbe managed to secure his arms behind his back as Goyle put all his force into a punch to Draco's ribs. The blonde's torrent of abuse subsided as the wind left his lungs and he slumped over to try and catch his breath.

Blaise stared at him, still trembling, for a few seconds before his face clouded with anger. "Don't just stand there," He screamed at his cronies, quickly reaching boiling point. "Get him, get him!" Crabbe tightened his grip on Draco's arms, popping his left shoulder out of its socket, before Goyle began raining punches on him just as he'd done to Blaise.

As the abuse continued, Blaise regained some of his composure, and rage. "You? Kill me? Don't make me laugh!" As Draco was being held down and beaten, a renewed sense of confidence overcame Blaise and he limped towards the blond. Goyle momentarily stopped the torrent of punches as Blaise approached, reaching a hand out towards Draco and roughly grabbing his chin, bringing there eyes to the same level. Draco's breathing was laboured and his whole body hurt, but the rage still burned behind his eyes causing some of Blaise's confidence to fail him. "You could never do me any real damage, you're almost as pathetic as Scarhead. You should have heard him, whimpering and crying, it was like music to my ears."

Again there was a sickening crunch as Draco freed an arm from Goyle's grip and his fist connected with Blaise's jaw. He was like a wild animal, cornered and fighting for its life. Draco thrashed and clawed and kicked and did everything in his power to free himself from Crabbe's grip. Terror filled Blaise as he once again looked up at Draco from the floor, the blonds battered face looking as though every bone in his body wanted nothing more than to rip Blaise limb from limb. Crabbe's grip was loosening, much to Blaise's despair, and he instantly curled into a ball, his arms covering his face.

"Stop, stop!" He whimpered, feeling Draco's fingertips brushing against his hair as he scrambled to attack whatever he could reach. "Shouldn't you be worrying more about your boyfriend?" Instantly all motion from Draco stopped and the only sounds that could be heard were of four teens panting into the cold room. Draco's eyes went from Blaise to the door of the room and with a strength he didn't know he possessed he wrenched his arm free of Crabbe's grip and flew towards the door.

Without even touching his wand, Draco obliterated the charms that held the door shut and sped through the open doorway leaving the three Slytherin's in shocked silence. He had to find Harry, he had to make sure he was alright, he wasn't sure what he'd do if Harry had suffered, once again, because of him.

**A/N:** At last! I tried posting this chapter up about 3 days ago but my laptop was being an arse and wouldn't let me sign in for some reason. However! Here it is, probably the penultimate chapter, pretty sure the rest of the story will fit into just the one, although I may do a "sometime later" chapter after it, depends how it turns out and whether I like it or not lol. Loads of stuff is going on in my life at the moment (starting to sound like a broken record aren't I?) but I will get the next chapter done as soon as possible. And as it's the last I might be more motivated to get it done sooner but again no promises. Just bare with me and I shall, eventually finish this.

Also, thanks to everyone who's left reviews, really helps me get in a writing mood when I open my emails and seei reviews and story adds. Love you guys loads, wouldn't write without you! (I have fans, it's so awesome!)


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